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30 year-old male; its past time to do this

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Christian11, Oct 10, 2013.

  1. Oct 10, 2013 #1
    Christian11

    Christian11 Fapstronaut

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    Hi all,
    My names Christian and I'm not quite sure where to start. I ran into porn at around 12 and have been flapping since then. I'm not sure if I would put myself in the addicted category but I'm at the least straddling the fence. Over the last 2 1/2 years the content of my porn selection became increasingly extreme and I've become increasingly ashamed.The frequency of flapping also increased to multiple times a day (seriously, there was chafing).

    Recently my sex life has suffered as my expectations exceeded reality. I tend to zone out in the middle of it now and while we both finish its not nearly as enjoyable as it once was. I think it played a major part in us breaking up.

    I want my life back. I miss the intimacy between women and myself when we make love. I miss having control over my own body and the willpower to resist urges/compilations. I want to reset my brain.

    I've tried to abstain before but have never made the seven day mark. I'm on day 5 now and am having some problems. When I wake up in the morning I'm rocking a kickstand and my dreams are erotic and vivid. My mind wanders when I'm not occupied running wild with fantasies involving women I know. The worst is when I come home. In the privacy of my apt. the compilations double, at least, in intencity. Its hard to fight them.

    I used to go to the gym and use urges to fuel my workout but I've got no time to hit the gym right now. The only reason I haven't fallen off the wagon is because I know there are others like me out there. If anyone has some suggestions my ears are open. I want to hit my 1st goal at the 2 week mark and ultimately the total brain reset.

    Cheers,
    Christian
     
    Christian11, Oct 10, 2013
    Christian11, Oct 10, 2013
    #1
  2. Oct 11, 2013 #2
    DireWolf

    DireWolf Fapstronaut

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    Welcome Christian!, Porn is an awful and disgusting thing, women who have been used and destroyed by porn can testify to that, its great that we come here admiting we have an addiction problem, taking a huge step into making ourselves and the world a better place by becoming better people, Welcome again and remember you are not alone on this trip!
     
    DireWolf, Oct 11, 2013
    DireWolf, Oct 11, 2013
    #2
  3. Oct 11, 2013 #3
    benignintenz

    benignintenz Fapstronaut

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    I don't know that porn is awful and disgusting any more than sex is. It may be truer to say that what people do with porn, and the effect that it has on some people when they get out of control of it is awful and disgusting.

    There have been men and women who have faired poorly in the porn industry, and there have been men and women that have fared well.

    Part of any addiction problem as you call it, is taking ownership and responsibility for your part in it. As a consumer of porn, you contribute to its perpetuation. As a porn addict, your choices have led you to a poor outcome affecting you and those around you in the negative. Without that self-honesty and responsibility taking, it is unlikely that a good lasting outcome will result.
     
    Last edited: Oct 11, 2013
    benignintenz, Oct 11, 2013
    benignintenz, Oct 11, 2013
    #3
  4. Oct 11, 2013 #4
    NellyNel

    NellyNel Fapstronaut

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    Don't worry im 28 dealing with the SAME issues. I hit my fed up mark during my last intimate moment wtih a women and it was really bad and embarrassing. Now its time to fight this problem and when we overcome this obstacle in life. The sex life will become more enjoyable with women from this time on. When you feel these urges during the day or early in the morning. Try putting some ice down there to cool urself down. The body is in heat and the feel coldness will help the body go down. If anything keep in touch your friend on here.
     
    NellyNel, Oct 11, 2013
    NellyNel, Oct 11, 2013
    #4

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