9.5 Months Porn Free

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by parad0x, May 20, 2020.

  1. parad0x

    parad0x Fapstronaut

    178
    286
    63
    I'll keep this brief as I'm pretty busy with life nowadays and not so focused on struggling with nofap anymore thus don't log in here anymore.

    Feel free to ask questions and I'll return over the coming days and weeks to answer questions when I can.

    This is a success story in the fact I have abstained from porn for 9.5 months. But not a complete success as I still have some lingering side effects that I think are related. But overall I'm on the right path I believe.

    Here is my timeline and experience:

    First 3 months (Hardmode) - Complete mess, damn near mental breakdown.

    Months 3-4 (No P & M) - Spontaneous erections returned and I decided to start dating again. I meet someone and began resuming a sex life with a lowish libido and crappy refractory period (like 24 hours)

    Months 4-7 Life is good, no desire to watch porn. Enjoying my new GFs company I still had a somewhat average libido (compared to pre-porn days). But it was enough to satisfy and keep my girl

    Months 7 -9.5 - I'm completely over the fetish (TS porn) and the mare thought revolts me. However, I'm sure if I'm not vigilant that neural pathway could be reopened. I hold a lot of shame & guilt for that part of my life as it does not align with who I am.

    That is why this is not a "full recovery" story (just yet). Perhaps it's PAWS but I still get depressive episodes that can last a few days to a week. But they pass and I'm ok again. I hope with time, they will pass completely.

    About month 6 I reintroduced fapping to touch only and only very occasionally. Like once a month. Sometimes the bluebells get a bit too much and I need a release.

    I must stress I do not fantasize during this and it's purely mechanical.

    It has not lead me back to porn as some say it will. However, I still believe in a strong initial hard mode period at the beginning before choosing this path.

    Right some benefits as I know that's what everyone wants!

    I feel much more confident. I have reconnected with my masculine energy big time. I command respect and return it mutually.

    Gaining control over one thing in my life has a side effect of giving me control over many many more things in my life. The discipline to do nofap has spilled over into all areas. Money, Business, and Fitness specifically. I set big goals and methodically plan out my day with mini-tasks that move me closer to those goals. In short, I EXECUTE,

    My mind, for the most part, is much sharper. Quitting porn has lifted a brain fog that on par with taking a natural Nootropic (think of the movie Limitless but obviously not quite that level lol).

    Finally, a word of caution. If your friends are anything like mine (horny males) it's likely you'll get subjected to porn occasionally. Sometimes my friends (who don't know about my journey) fwd me short clips through FB messenger of something triggering that they think is funny.

    You can't avoid porn completely society is saturated by it. I think the trick is to look at it (only if accidentally exposed) objectively, see it for what it is and put it out of your mind. Don't ruminate on it, this I believe actually helped me recover. My thought pattern is "Look at this, what a shame. There is no love here" and I close whatever it was I was looking at.

    Thanks NOFAP members
     
  2. Magottrybread

    Magottrybread Fapstronaut

    93
    160
    33
    You're an inspiration. Thanks for sharing, brother!
     
    parad0x likes this.
  3. biggame5k

    biggame5k Fapstronaut

    Awesome...Would you say having a girlfriend helped you in this situation?
     
  4. parad0x

    parad0x Fapstronaut

    178
    286
    63
    Yes, I think it can. But in hindsight I think I probably jumped into r/ship a bit too soon. It probably would have been beneficial to have been O free for a bit longer. I still had a lot of internal battles going on that were hard to manage with a partner. I persevered tho and all is good :)
     
  5. biggame5k

    biggame5k Fapstronaut

    Are you saying you don't want to be in this relationship? are you saying you settled? or are you saying you just have an overwhelming drive to cheat?
     
  6. ELN

    ELN Fapstronaut

    20
    31
    13
    Good post, thanks for sharing. How many years have you been addicted?
     
  7. parad0x

    parad0x Fapstronaut

    178
    286
    63
    I'm saying that had I waited a bit longer I could have bought a better man (myself) into the relationship.
     
  8. parad0x

    parad0x Fapstronaut

    178
    286
    63
    I would say I had used porn periodically since my teens. But there was a sudden spike and escalation in my use about 10 years ago.
     
  9. P0wer0N

    P0wer0N New Fapstronaut

    1
    0
    1
    Hi man. Very good post.
    How old are you if you don’t mind me asking?
    You mentioned nootropic. Which ones did you use? And which ones yield the best results? I tried several like Rhodiola. I didn’t feel much difference.
    Thank you for your help and keep on the good work.
    All the best
     
  10. parad0x

    parad0x Fapstronaut

    178
    286
    63
    Nothing at the moment. But I have used modafinil in the past.
     

Share This Page