A New Beginning

Hey guys. A year ago I stumbled upon NoFap after going through a pretty rough depression. One of the most worrying parts of it was my anhedonia. From the age of 11 I was a heavy user of porn (2-3 times per day) and I thought nothing of it, thought it was just something kids do. Fast forward to 20 years old to my current sexual experiences, of the 6 girls I’ve had sex with I’ve only managed to reach climax with 2. There was so much shame associated with this for me, had I completely conditioned my brain to pixels rather than flesh? After a lengthy period of improving myself to try and beat my depression I can honestly say that I kicked its ass but one thing still remained, my addiction to porn. After giving this a try last year in the depths of my depression and failing, I am ready now to go for a full reboot. I have the goal of 90 days in my head but I’ve come to accept that I may have to do a lot more than that due to my heavy use. Today is my 7th day of no PMO and I have to say I feel like shit, full blown withdrawal already. But I know that I have to make this change in my life. For the past year my libido has been non existence for real girls, I look at them thinking “Wow, they’re beautiful” but nothing in the loins at all. The main reasons I am doing this is to in some way try to regain my libido, not to objectify woman again, but to have a real connection with them. Because of my performance problems in the past I have all but stopped looking for partners due to shame. I was never really the best with women in the first place but for so long I feel like fapping has robbed me of my masculine energy and all that comes with it. I have come to terms with the fact that this won’t be easy, my brain practically developed with porn. But I am ready to face the challenge, with the support of you guys, because I know that I have so much more to give.