Hey, Been fapping for over half my life and I would like to bring it to an end. Started out in public school with porn. Eventually got bored of that and started to become a “f*ckboy” in high school. However it was always just over the phone. I would never talk to a girl in real life and actually was quite embarrassed with my behaviour when I made it to school. This always led to a lack of confidence and not much of a social life. After high school I really got on the path of self development. However fapping always stuck. I either had to do it to be able to focus on my work or I just did it cause I was bored. Once I realized the negative effects I’ve tried on multiple occasions to stop but never could. Always came up with a lame excuse or didn’t have a big enough reason too. I don’t even enjoy it anymore. I really just do it to get rid of the urges. Anyways, I just got over a breakup and am really wanting to level up. Kind of in a “make her regret it” kind of mindset right now. Im doing a dopamine detox to try and improve my focus. But I also want to challenge myself to get over fapping. I feel like if I can will myself past it then I can will myself to do anything. wondering if anyone has any advice on how to make it stick for the long run. Also how do you deal with wet dreams. My latest excuse has been when I get an eroctic dream I wake up and fap so that it doesn’t make a fricken mess!
Quitting porn after relying on it so long is a process. Replace the dopamine, use exercise but look for other ways. Keep occupied, and keep something in mind to think about instead of fantasies. Delete social media. Even if they aren’t loaded with porn substitutes, though they probably are, they’re stupid and a waste of time and degrade your quality of life. Journal every day, so you can look back and find the trigger patterns. Wear pants to bed. Porn is probably more to you than just cheap dopamine. You’ll eventually have to figure out what and replace it in order to quit long term. Otherwise you’re white-knuckling it and God knows, you can get really good at white-knuckling, but you’ll never be completely safe if that’s your only method. Every reset is a potential learning experience. Best of luck.
Yeah, that's great advice Meshuga. I second the replace suggestion - you can't just run away from something; in the beginning if you're really struggling, then sure, figure out how to deal with your urges, remove the most obvious temptations, etc, but for the long run you have to want something else more, something that you value more, will mean more to you, and will give you more pleasure and satisfaction in the long run. For me, it's my faith, wanting to be a virtuous and devoted husband when the time comes, and wanting to be a more productive part of society. Porn has ravaged my self-confidence and tries to sabotage my other goals in life. It has to go!
