Ahhhhh damn..

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Edgar Allan Hoe, Dec 19, 2018.

  1. Edgar Allan Hoe

    Edgar Allan Hoe Fapstronaut

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    Hi guys!

    I don't wanna give my name, sorry
    But anyway, is that important?
    Please forgive my english and if there are typos, I'm french btw.

    It's my gazillion time that I fail, I tried a ton of methods, and now I'm feeling right now really bother and helpless in front of my addiction. It's really a shame to be an expert of recovery but being unable to use this knowledge enough to suceed. I don't wanna blame myself, as I said I'm an expert now and I know it's such a waist of time.. uhhhhhhhh.

    Anyway, by where to start? It might be important to say that I never reach more than 20 days, and I'm starting think that my issue is mostly rely on anxiety and stress who makes me use pornography as a buffer to avoid as much as I can to suffer from it. I due know what make me happy, but I'm feeling quite alone through my streak. Even though I told to my girlfriend, she just could be until now a mirror of my addiction post relapse talk, and she can't do the streak instead of me. Actually I can say I'm quite really lucky, because I found out I'm so affraid by some aspect of the life, and more specifically about my career choice : I want to be a musical artist, and this makes me soooo stress.

    And I'm really upset that is so expensive to get a talk with a psychanalyst who can have an impact only with a regular appointment, I visited one few times but damn the price is so high.


    Et voilà, it was really messy first post.
    Sorry for that.. I hope I will come to this forum tomorrow and maybe find a solution with you guys. Have a good night!
     
    The587, Trakinas and Ffob2468 like this.
  2. Trakinas

    Trakinas Fapstronaut

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    The secret: is a day at a time!
    Welcome this journey bro
    I'm newbie here too,
    I met NoFap 8 days ago and since then I'm without PMO. When I saw all that guys talking about their fights i got very motivated to do the same think
    you can do it, cause you're stronger than you think
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  3. So you have experience to reach 20 days it is very good plus factor you have.like in previous reply secret is a day at a time. So motivate yourself spend free time here get more knowledge get more information and you can extend it to one month then two and reach finally to reboot.
     
  4. The587

    The587 New Fapstronaut

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    Do you find your going to porn because you're trying to avoid reality amd your ever so challenging dreams and goals?
     
  5. Edgar Allan Hoe

    Edgar Allan Hoe Fapstronaut

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    Trakinas : Thanks man! Yeah I need to decide again to adopt an active way to change my life. The issue with relapse is always that after you builded a belief, proudness, effort, it is hard to directly go back on streak. But I have to admit now : if I'm relapsing, it doesn't change anything to blame myself, firstly, it reinforce the process of relapse and give it to him too much power on me, secondly, relapse it supposed to make us just able to change our strategies to change our life, it is time to fullfill my life with positive energy (nature, animal, passion like music in my case, learning korean and english, save up money to back travel, and most important think listen myself when doubt seems to appears and let it just go through me and it will pass!)
     
    Trakinas likes this.
  6. Edgar Allan Hoe

    Edgar Allan Hoe Fapstronaut

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    The 587 : Yeah! Actually it is not that obvious, it is more sneaky. Our brain is a really lazy machine, and with porn, or any other addiction, he find a way to avoid to have to ask about new questions or questions he already found an answer. Normally this process is useful in our daily life, to be able to consecrate our time for new things and don't get flooding by repetitive questions by in this case, he just hack the system and install a deep sneaky roots habits in our responsive system to emotion. That is why the most important thing in my eyes to stay on streak is to be connected about your emotions : what usually make you thrill, excite you, make you feel like you are doing something great and pure? For me I discover that I really like to do cooking, learning language, making music, enjoy the nature at the park, reading, listen great music, actually porn make us blind about all the amazing way around us to find pleasure and happiness around us!
     
  7. Hey brother!

    I was in a bit stressful life too earlier when I was doing a job that I hated. Switching career ( though not an easy task ) and propelling yourself in the direction of the things you love would surely make your life better and more fulfilled and possibly reduce the frequency of your sexual acts.

    I would advise you to read the rebooting guide which helped me to cross 4 months without PMO during the starting of 2018. Hope to see you active here!
     
  8. The587

    The587 New Fapstronaut

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    Yes!!! This is the same with me. I find that I want to achieve soooo many things in my life that I get hestiant or I try to avoid it for awhile. Even as I am typing I feel to go watch it but I'm holding out. I wanted to find someone with the same ssue as well. Focus on my goals got it!
     

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