ANXIETY +DEPRESSION =PORN??

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Cool Joey, Oct 5, 2016.

  1. Cool Joey

    Cool Joey Fapstronaut

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    Hello fellow nofappers.Few months back,I was feeling too depressed for days together.So I decided to go the doc.He said that I depression in the early stages so it is to be reduced through constant positive atmosphere and help.I was relieved and I followed his advice.Right now I feel that depression has passed.But when was going through that phase,my porn habits worsened.I thought that once the depression has passed,so will these urges.But it is only getting worse.I don't have depression but my porn habits are slowly leading to anxiety and self doubt.I've got zero confidence and concentration.I feel like I've become a lost cause.Even during my study time,Im just lying on the bed and jacking off.Seriously my porn choices are also worrying me.They are getting weirder and weirder.Even though I don't want to waste my time,I feel like I've lost the control over my mind.I don't know what to do .I hope you people can give me some advice into this matter urgently.
     
  2. volt2187

    volt2187 Guest

    There are 3 pieces of advice I can give you. First you must quit the pmo habit. That alone from my personal experience causes anxiety, which amplifies the self doubt as well as leads to confidence issues. TRUST ME on this one. I was an 8 year pmo user and over the last year from quitting slowly it's changed everything for me. I'm currently on a 24 day streak and feel more confident than ever and anxiety is almost non-existent. O and let me tell you the whole self-doubt thing is what completely fucked me up over those last 8 years and now I don't even second guess most of my decisions I just do it because it's not worth overthinking it or making yourself miserable because you feel unworthy, which porn trains you to think that way. By giving into porn your basically saying "well shit, I can't get a girl in real life so I'll settle for a fake version". Fuck that, go after the real thing, it's so much better.

    Second you have to push yourself out of your comfort zone. By jerking off to porn on a regular basis you create this little bubble where all you want to do is get off to fucking pixels on a screen and interacting with the real world can seem like an impossible task at times. You have to do the exact opposite of the pmo, which is force yourself to go out there and interact with others, even when you're scared to or don't feel like it. And do shit that you would never dream of or are afraid of. The feeling afterwards is one of the best experiences you can have, plus it will help with your confidence issues.

    And thirdly just focus on being the best version of yourself everyday. Don't think about yesterday or the future you. Make everyday the best you possibly can. Have belief in yourself that you can do amazing things with your life, and the confidence will come to you eventually. Do things you are comfortable with and be fucking proud of them which helps tremendously with the confidence. Just one for me is that I lost 60lbs and ran a marathon, which previously I was a computer gaming couch potato. How awesome is that? Whenever I feel down about myself I think damn man, I'm a fucking badass who can do amazing things with my life. Same goes with kicking the pmo habit. It's damn hard to do but even when you have a few day or a week streak celebrate that shit man, because I can tell you it's hard to untrain yourself from this addiction.

    Just keep your head up and know that you can change anything in your life if you have enough drive to do it.
     
  3. Themadfapper

    Themadfapper Fapstronaut

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    Those are my triggers too. Anxiety is a bad one, and depression is the worst for me. I was feeling a lot of anxiety recently and was getting depressed and it led [last night] to my looking at cams, porn, chatting on skype, till nearly 7 in the morning, and I could not get to sleep despite feeling exhausted. Reminds me of being on speed, and wondering to myself why the hell am I doing this drug? It was a downright hellish experience and then I ended up fapping in the evening of the next day which really made me feel down. I managed to pull myself out of it, go exercise get my blood pumping and now I feel better, but why did I put myself through all that?
     
    Cool Joey likes this.
  4. stop watching all porn. expect some weird things to happen in your head. but that will all go away, you have to stay very strong that's key. who cares if you lay on your bed just jacking, but try, try is the key, try not to even have ANY fantasies in your head while you do it, if they come, try to think about anything but sexual stuff. you need to release tension. nothing wrong with that. just don't even look at pictures, soft porn, NOTHING!!! of course those thoughts will come in your head when you jack of, so after a few weeks of m with out any porn. you will need to get on what is called 'hard mode' for yikes 90 days! no masturbating. that will get all the crap out of your head. just expect to have weird thoughts, responses, that's normal for people getting out of porn.
     
    goldstein likes this.
  5. Porn dulls your senses and causes depression. You then turn to porn to relive yourself to fix your emotions or depression. It's a cycle. Kill porn and you will be less depressed.

    Improving your life will have the inverse effect. You improve it, you feel less depressed, so then you can kill porn easier and you will be more motivated to futher improve your life. You have to change your habbits so they slowly build a better you rather than lead you to ruin.
     
    goldstein and Cool Joey like this.
  6. droolpillow

    droolpillow Fapstronaut

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    I know the feeling bro. I wouldn't say I struggle with depression, but for me stress and anxiety really makes me have the urge to fap. I can control myself somewhat reasonably when I am calm and normal, but when I am stressed I have trouble with self control when it comes to fapping.

    I've been studying/incorporating meditation to be able to calm my mind. So far it has helped at least with the stress, but the urges don't always go away as easily. I still have a lot to learn.

    I am not sure if you are a spiritual person, but I also find prayer for strength helpful.
     
  7. Cool Joey

    Cool Joey Fapstronaut

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    I understand what you're trying to say.
     
  8. Cool Joey

    Cool Joey Fapstronaut

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    I'll try meditation.Thank you for the reply
     
  9. Cool Joey

    Cool Joey Fapstronaut

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    Thanks man
     
  10. Cool Joey

    Cool Joey Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for your advice man.I appreciate it.
     
  11. SnowWhite

    SnowWhite Fapstronaut

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    Really good answer! I became totally healed of anxiety and depressions, and all of your steps were an essential part of the process.

    I want to add a 4th: Take full responsibility for everything. I found that depression / anxiety is a state where you are "lost" and you are seeking for others to comfort or helping you. You are avoiding decisions and you hope that others will decide for you. But you can turn this around by taking responsibility and control.

    Decide for yourself actively to be alone and to take control over yourself.

    In fact you are always "alone", and it depends on you to make the best out of it. Don't rely on others, only rely on yourself.
    And if you do, you will grow, really grow. You will do all the things you really like, and you will become a really happy person.
    You will also become a real good decent human, because you are centered and connected to the universe and feel a gratitude towards it.
     
    volt2187 and goldstein like this.
  12. I think also, regular MO with out even porn, say if I start O every single day, then I stop doing in, on day 6 or so I start getting weird dreams, and feel diferent, I have recently heard that O's give you about as much of a high as drugs, and the interesting thing is, just like drugs, after about 6 days of non mo, I feel I need to again, to feel 'normal' so the depression can come along with just quitting mo also, I gave up porn 2 years ago.
     
  13. Cool Joey

    Cool Joey Fapstronaut

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    Yep you are right.I am not able to trust myself right now.But I need to learn to rely on myself instead of waiting for something miraculous to turn everything around.Thanks for the support:)
     
  14. Cool Joey

    Cool Joey Fapstronaut

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    Thanks man.I will have to stay strong.Thank you for the support.
     
  15. SnowWhite

    SnowWhite Fapstronaut

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    Yes, exactly! "Waiting for something miraculous" - that describes it very good.

    Another tipp: When you feel the early onset of a depression, then remember your saying. And in that moment try to get control back. Find a solution and take a decision.
    It's important to get the picture that a meaningful life means to decide, to take responsibility and to be in control all the time.
    When you do that, then the depressive phases will first become shorter, and one day they are gone forever.
     
  16. goldstein

    goldstein Fapstronaut

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    i would add that you need to install blockers on your devices. If you can, do a random password, and give it to a friend you can trust. It is a great help in this journey for me. And i cant say to you how much meditation helps with the recovery if you can go to a course or try to find a method that good for you on internet, you wont regret. best wishes and good luck
     

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