Any solid advice for quitting?

Hello, I advise you to stop using any phone or computer that access the internet for a while, give yourself a rest, stop being alone, stop all sexual fantasies, avoid bad friends, socialize more often, go to bed only when sleepy.

I've been an addict for over 40 years. I just admitted it to myself a few months ago. I'm in a relationship for about 13 years and my PIED severely damaged the relationship. Currently, I'm over 90 days porn-free. After learning about what happens behind the scene in most porn (kidnapping, human trafficking, and rape) I am done for good with porn. NEVER AGAIN. I may eventually return to fapping but in a more moderate way.

Delete all porn and porn bookmarks from all your devices. I recommend abstaining from social media and this includes YouTube. Also, put porn blockers on all devices. This is crucial at least for the first 90 days of your no PMO journey.

If you have successfully abstained for 90 days, then you can continue using the internet-enabled gadget, but filters and blockers have to be installed in them, delete all files that contain explicit materials from your devices, parental control software should also be considered. If you are brave enough to trust somebody (a friend, family member, religious leader, psychiatrist, or a counselor) you share your experience with him, Let him or her be there to help you and alert him or her whenever you feel the urge to PMO by call, text, or any other mean.

Doing the above steps would boost up your motivation, improve your willpower, and make you good at decision-making. The next step is to remove all blockers, and filters from your phones or computers, download self-help ebooks such as "internet pornography and the emerging science of addiction” by Gary Wilson, read them anytime you feel the urge.

If you can strictly adhere to the steps, I think you can quit PMO.

Hints:

1. Social media are poison, resume using them only when you feel healed,

2. Instantly delete any image, text, video clip, or movie, that contain nudity, no matter how interested you are in it.

3. Go out there and look for real girls (wife, or girlfriend) to rewire yourself to a natural setting, run away from prostitutes they could not help but rather eat up your money. Good luck.

 

Found the freedom has put it quite exquisitely. Porn isn't an addiction the real addiction is dopamine. You need to channel it to something else. For me I challenged it to workout and self respect. Some individuals get the same dopamine spike when someone admire the physicall appearance, work ethic and what not. I believe you need something like this. Avoid using social media for good. It's nothing but slow poison and trigger for for PMO. Pick up a great personality and try to copy some of his attributes. I am trying to copy working hard from Erin Romnel. Cold showers have really helped me and trust me cold showers after an hour physical exercise can literally help you. Only you can do it. Make your mind and stick to it like a man straned on some planet and trying to save his oxygen.

Read onanism.

 

Keep in mind those women r putting on a show for the camera(those watching, you!) in real life women don’t act or even like the acts involved in P. It’s all for show to draw you into watch. It’s not a reality.

 

This is from a new-to-NoFap but also a 40+ year relationship with PMO: try talking with your GF and ask for her help.

I for the first time in a 20+ year marriage an able to leave the shame and embarrassment behind, and openly talk about what are my potential drivers and triggers, what kinds of porn I preferred, even what kinds of things she could do to help. Just today I told her I would probably need a 90-day Monk mode to reset myself - I had occasionally had anorgasmia (inability to orgasm).

On top of having an accountability partner found here, and a weekly session through this site NoFap.com.

OP you may not have the history I have, everyone is different, but the premise is the same: NoFap means exactly that - no more PMO and poof I have no drive for M and O. But unless you have and use many tools available (especially talking to others) it won’t work.

 

If you need a consequence, just know that you WILL be caught eventually. It's not a question of it, but when.

And WHEN you get caught, you very well may lose your fiance, and if it's down the road enough, your kids as well.

Cut the crap about vanilla, and if you want to try something tell your fiance.

 

Figure out who you are.

 

Hey, man. Not a lot of specific advice. I struggle as much as you. I am married and much of what you say about your relationship with your fiancé matches my relationship with my wife. I mostly just wanted to chime in with empathy. I too wonder sometimes what the endgame is here. No porn again ever?! No fapping ever?! Maybe that's true, but I know in the place you're in right now that's hard to imagine seriously.

All those hard mode suggestions are good, but I know how difficult it sounds (and can be) to implement them. I've had most success starting out small. Set yourself some ground rules, such as no more fapping when your gf is around. Finding success with some of those lesser goals instills confidence that may help you set bigger goals and succeed at them.

 

I think of it as this; you don't NEED sex to survive. Your genitals may tingle after no porn use but that's just because they are used to you beating them up and stimulating them, it's a side effect of addiction. It's just like weed in that it takes a long time before the cannabinoids leave your body and you stop craving another hit of dopamine your brain THINKS it "needs". Truth is there are males in society who never looked at porn before and don't even generate genital stimulation because they don't ever touch themselves. Instead they don't really look at women or men sexually because it's just another day for them to look at the opposite sex. Porn trains you look focus on the sex than the person. Try to stay abstinent and disregard your penis sensations by thinking of something not sexy