Anyone else suffer from Porn-Induced-PREMATURE-Ejaculation (as opposed to Delayed)?

@Omnitron310 ,

Thanks to @The First & Last for the Kudos and the mention on this post. I try not to share my opinion only my ESH (experience, strength and hope).

Unfortunately my problems from pmo have included PIED and DE. But, not premature ejaculation. I do agree that having a lack of privacy and therefore needing to make your pmo quick could add to your PE problem, but I have no ability to confirm that.

My experience is that having been circumcised I've had a great loss of sensitivity. Death grip did not help this.

Hopefully, you can either get an answer here or (I know, I know dudes don't take their penises to the doctor) go to a doctor and ask for help. There might be something they can offer.

- L

 

Hi. Am new here and just wanted to share my thoughts for once in my life and stop lurking in the shadows.
I have been experiencing the same phenomenon for the past 7 years (though i started masterbating when i was in my early teens). I believe its because i have been watching porn for long intervals (1 to 3hr intervals) before i masterbate, to a point that my body can not keep up with the demands and gives in as quickly as possible. I am not sure if this holds true but i want to stop these habits and be normal/healthier

 

Hey @Kizito.D ,

My ESH is that you can stop those habits. But it takes work.

Work it? Oh yeah. There's work to be done, that's what's worked for me. Two things I've found necessary.

1. I had to Learn the NoFap Program.

2. Getting involved with the community on here was vital to help my recovery.

Learn the NoFap Program
The resources listed on the "New Users: List of Rebooting Resources" helped me find my way around the reasons behind the program and the terms used.

They are:

• Download the free Getting Started guide.
• Set up a PMO-Counter Badge. More info here!
• Basic introduction to the science of porn addiction!
• Basic information about rebooting and how our challenges can help you recover from PMO. This is the most important page to read. If you only can read one page, read this one.
• About NoFap.
• Watch this video - it is an epic intro resource if you want to get particular details about porn addiction and how it changes how your brain works.
• This is a good light-weight video about porn addiction.
• Read through the journal sections and see what other rebooters have experienced. It is good to know what to expect, otherwise the "chaser effect", "the surge", or the "flatline" might throw you off.
• If you come across vocabulary that you can't understand, check out our rebooting glossary of terms.
• GET ACCOUNTABLE FOR YOUR HABITS! Sign up for a peer accountability partner. Otherwise if you want more professional-hosted solutions, check out NoFap Premium or Reboot Camp. If you can afford to invest in yourself, these are great options.

You can find this same list on the top of the forum you posted this message on at - the "New to NoFap" forum.

Get Involved with the Community
The community has been my lifeline. I've found journals I love, people who are very supportive and a place where I could get to work helping in a small way others.

I'm nobody important around here. Just a normal user with no magic powers.

But, I can:

• Read Journals, and comment when I have ESH
• Find people I admire and stay in touch via their profiles
• Pick a forum and make sure evvery post gets and answer. I can't answer them all, but that's good - different opinions make for a better group.
• Post in my journal (I could be better at it - but I do milestone posts at least) To make a journal go to the section listed by age and start one. Keep all your journal posts in one thread. But, for random thoughts, you can create a new thread.

Looking forward to seeing you around on the forums,

- L

PS - Think of pmo like a wolf. Stay near the center of the group with the winners and the wolf has a more difficult time finding you. But, stray near the edges of the community and the wolf can pick you off.

 

I also have PE. One of my first sexual experiences comes from watching erotic movies on cable TV when I was maybe 15-16 years old (that was pre-internet era). I remember always being on stress being caught doing this. I never masturbated watching these movies, just watched them holding my finger on remote glancing through my shoulder if mom is not here. And later, when I discovered internet porn, I didn't had computer/internet at home and was browsing websites at work. Very similar situation, always feeling unsecure, doing something bad and afraid of being caught. Just watching for hours and ejaculating later, when I got back home, replaying all images I saw in my head. My first masturbation experiences from teen years were also 'do it as quick as possible'.

 

Thank you lots for the mention my friend, you're an amazing inspiration yourself! Love the encouragement and support you give all of us here, thanks for being a part of NoFap!

 

So does reboot help with PE or not???

 

Hey @TheGoldenEra ,

I wish I knew the answer to your question for with certainty. But, I don't.

From what I do know about PE, doctors treat it with certain medications and sometimes circumcision or recircumcision. I've even read about circumcision combined with stripping out some of the nerves.

Everything I've read about the NoFap program and my own experience tells me that it helps with delayed ejaculation. But, I've not read about it's effects on premature ejaculation.

If you are having a problem with porn, then this is the program for you even if it doesn't help with PE.

Nothing in the NoFap program says you can't get help both here and from your doctor.

--> L

 

Hi @StopTheMusic thank you so much for your support I genuinely appreciate it. Basically I've already been circumcised and my PE was not always there. It has developed only recently.

Some say it's due to the conditioning of pmo. putting your body in a habit of finished as fast as possible which is what I think I mostly likely occurring in my case. I may go and see my doctor about this, but defo thanks for your help.

Have a nice day and stay strong!!

 

Hey @TheGoldenEra ,

No problem. I hope your journey goes well. You are in a great place. If pmo is causing your PE, then NoFap is a great place to find support.

Please keep us informed on how you are doing. Good luck at the doctor. The doctor might send your to a urologist. It's a frustrating system to work through, but with patience and a willingness to be open with the doctors they do have help.

Perhaps you are correct and it's more the pmo and it will resolve.

 

For me it's delayed, though only when I'm with a woman. I can ejaculate easily to porn, though with a woman, even a gorgeous woman it's delayed and difficult to ejaculate, and it's been getting worse over the years.

My aim at the moment is to forget about becoming intimate with a woman again until I can control this life destroying addiction

 

I definitely will let you know. The British system is very different to the US though. And tbh I don't really wanna go...like cos I'm under 18 I have to have my mom drive me there. And boy that's gonna not only gonna be difficult but embarrassing to explain to her as well.

 

Hey @TheGoldenEra ,

I know what you mean. I had surgery when I was younger. They shaved me "down there". Today they don't shave down patients like they used to because it can cause more infections than it stopped. Anyways, I got an ingrown hair. But, I didn't know what it was. My mom drove me to the surgeon for a normal check up. I showed the surgeon the monster pimple/infection and he thought is was a urological problem and got me into a urologist right away. My mom drove me there as well. So, there I sat in the urologist office with my mom in the waiting room and everyone having a discussion about my junk. The urologist lanced it and gave me an antibiotic. It resolved.

Why do I tell you this? Because the whole time my mom was fine with it. Her only concern is that I was getting the treatment I needed. So, I'd bet your mother would be very understanding. Don't assume she'd not be helpful. Mothers have seen so much and know so much more than their children think.

I don't know about the UK, but in the US it's normal for a mother to stay in the room during an exam. But, if the parent and the child agree an nurse can take the place of the mother so the child feels more comfortable talking. It is an extremely good idea for their to be at least two adults in the room during any physical exam. We live in a fucked up world and that is just part of it. When I had the post surgical infection, I was able to go into the exam room with a nurse and the doctor. You could at least ask if that's an option.

You don't have to suffer. My guess is that you're fine and that the doctor will recommend some ways for your to work on the PE which are common sense lifestyle changes. The reason I suggested a doctor is that this was sudden onset. You didn't say if you'd started any new medications when the PE started. But, the pmo could be a contributing factor.

I'd wish you good luck - but, instead I'm going to say, be kind to yourself and take care.

--> L

 

@StopTheMusic thank you for all your support. I understand what you mean. And thank you for your advice. This isnt something that happened overnight it's been a while since I had it, it just took me long to notice it.

As for lifestyle factors I don't take any medication, I don't smoke, I don't do drugs. Well in fact I've never smoked, done drugs or alcohol. I have a pretty healthy lifestyle.

Agreed...but how the hell do I even bring this up? "Hey mom I have a problem, I finish in less than a minute" that's awkward af. Plus she thinks I quit pmo long ago(which I shouldve mentioned earlier) , so bringing that up with her could cause some other issues. I've checked so many places online, they only give "quick" temporary fixes. The only way I read is to "prolong M and recondition the body" which again something someone who's abstaining doesn't really wanna do. Plus they say practicing m and actually having

Spoiler: Possible trigger

intercourse (had to stay safe)

are 2 completely different things. So...any other advicemail? Maybe I should just hope the reboot cures it lol

 

Hey @TheGoldenEra ,

I think you were being really safe with your trigger. I do agree, better safe than sorry.

First, you may think your mother thinks you stopped pmo. I assure you that your mother knows that a teenage boy masturbates. There are three kinds of men in the world, those that will admit they masturbate, liars and those who would like to masturbate but some injury leaves them unable to.

Regarding how you talk to your mother, you know her better than I. Nevertheless (why is that one word?), I do know her love for you would make her want you to get help with any problem you have.

First I'd sit her down with a cup of tea (well, if it'd been me and my mom it would have been iced tea, but I digress), then I'd say something like this:

"Mom, have you heard of the "safe card" system some parents use? There's no real card, it's just an agreement between parents and their teenage children. The agreement is simple. Since it's easy for teenagers to find themselves in a situation where they might be at some risk (drinking, drugs, sex, a really bad driver is taking them home), the parents agree that if the teenager calls home and requests a pick up from the potentially dangerous situation, the parents will come and pick them up with no questions asked. Why?, because the parents would rather know their child is safe than get a gruesome report on what was happening and how their child got there in the first place."

Further:

"Parents have a "safe card" for any problems a teenager might be too embarrassed to talk about. If the teenager needs to see a professional like a doctor or psychologist, the parents agree to take them there with no questions asked. Eventually, they will most likely find out why, but the parents would rather their teenager get help than risk an untreated problem they are hiding".

Maybe type that out in your own words and hand it too her to read while the kettle is on We all know that in the UK a cuppa will make anything better.

She loves you and really won't care what the problem is.

Again, you know her far better than I. If she's ultra religious and thinks you don't masturbate, you might need to approach it differently. Maybe a trusted spiritual adviser or school counselor or school nurse?

You mentioned you'd been circumcised. It's not really an issue, but I assume it was for religious reasons as in the UK the circumcision rate is pretty low for non-religious reasons. I only bring this up because it might be in your religious tradition that masturbation is a sin or forbidden. That does complicate things a bit. But, it shouldn't stop you from getting help.

L

 

Ahh fuck man I'm sorry for continuously missing out the important details. I wish I had mentioned yes we are very religious. And pmo is a pretty big sin. Hence why I've been trying to stop, also why she thinks I no longer do it, id be honest with her. But that ships sailed like 2 years ago (with this matter I'm honest about everything else lol) Religious reasons are also why I was circumcised. Any who, as for the school nurse we don't have that in my college, we only have like these first aiders and that's it...

Thank you again for taking out the time to help this lost soul. Have a brilliant day.

 

I have also had some troubling experiences with PE in my life, especially when having sex with my girlfriend. I didn't always have this sort of problem, but the story you mentioned about privacy in your home life growing up sounds very similar to my own experiences. I actually have seen a difference there after committing to NoFap in terms of PE, and the results have been positive for me! My experience with this ought to be treated as anecdotal evidence, as I don't have any scientific evidence to back up the claim that NoFap can help with PE, so take that how you will.

Just to be clear: I've been committed to NoFap for 20 days at this point. My personal goals are to completely cut porn out of my life and to abstain from masturbating for 90 days. I have a girlfriend and we have had sex since I started NoFap, so abstinence from orgasms is not a part of my personal goals (sounds like it's not a part of your personal goals, either). I want to get to a point where my orgasms are healthy, rather than synthetic and compulsive. Anyway, since I started NoFap I noticed that things just feel so much more intimate between me and my girlfriend. My sexual experiences with her feel so much more valuable because they aren't just more dopamine rushes in an ocean of porn-induced dopamine rushes. When I was in the depth of my addiction, I was so used to having orgasms all the time from porn and masturbation that I would become very frustrated when we would hang out and not have sex. That wasn't fair to her, because she isn't always in the mood to have sex. Part of what I've discovered through NoFap is that I'm not always in the mood to have sex either, but I still felt like I wanted to all the time because I was addicted to the rush I was giving myself almost daily with porn.

Since starting NoFap, I've been much more relaxed about all this sort of stuff. When things do get physical with me and my girlfriend, it feels really special, and I started to realize how much I had been dulling my experiences with her by using porn (that was something I was really in denial about when I was deep in my addiction. I still enjoyed sex when I was watching porn all the time, and I used that as an excuse not to quit. I was enjoying sex, but I think I enjoy it even more now without NoFap, whether I have PE or not!). I've also re-discovered foreplay. Foreplay is such an important part of having sex, and I think that it is one of the most important factors in dealing with issues like PE, and thus far I've seen great results! Overall, I think the best way to deal with PE is just to relax and not overthink things. I think that the key is to truly enjoy being with your partner: not just in a sexual sense, but in a sense of companionship, and I think NoFap has helped me become closer with my girlfriend in many different ways. My mind feels clearer, I feel more confident, and I'm generally happier and more relaxed, and I think having all of those things has helped me with PE. I wouldn't say the problem has completely gone away, but things have certainly improved, and at this point I have a much better understanding of my own body, and I've realized that the most important thing isn't whether or not I can last long in bed, but whether or not I really feel intimate with my partner.

Hope that helps! Good luck with NoFap and everything else

 

I think there is a link between porn addiction and premature ejaculation during sex. I've found that because stimulation is difficult in intercourse when you are addicted to porn, your penis only starts to become hard when you are very aroused. That makes it difficult to continue sex while maintaining an erection and hence ejaculation comes more quickly. This has been my experience. After a reset of almost three weeks, sex had been better with my wife but now I have relapsed again and I fear a return to porn induced ED.