Hey guys, I've been battling a porn addiction for so long. I first found porn when i was 7, and have habitiually PMO'd since then (for almost 20 years). I'm so sick of this. I remember a time when I felt like I was possibly addicted but then I'd read the horror stories here and think I was different, and that I wasn't that bad and it was just a habit not an addiction. But now I wish i had 180'd years ago. Somehow I just didn't think it would get this bad. I've gone 10 days no PMO'd and relapsed today, so I feel a bit bummed out. This is a weird struggle too, because I feel like I can't tell anybody about it in real life. I feel afraid they'd always see me differently even though they love me. So it just eats away at me in silence. I hope I can get rid of this thing, but the days I get intense urges makes it feel like it's almost impossible. Hopefully through community I can get over this and move on with my life.
There are a lot of us here who feel the same way. Myself included. Starting a journal in the reboot logs forum is a great way to just "tell all". A great way to vent and let others know what you're going through.
Ten days is a great number. Well done and keep pushing. You're in agreat place for help and supportr. We're behind you!
I can relate to you, I found PMO super early and am now 42 working on this. Better late than never if it's any comfort you aren't a unique failure (which I told myself many times) look at the endless amount of people dealing with this issue.
10 days in porn world is like 70 days in real world. Don't beat yourself up too much- you had 10 days minus the crap & shame of pmo. As you're able- try to objectively look at the how & why of your addiction. I know- easier said than done, but ultimately it will require this of you. Be strong...
