so I am at a point where I feel I have completely messed myself up. I repeatedly on and off for the last few years have been looking at/chatting about cuckolding, and also get aroused at the idea of servicing men orally and chatted about it. Growing up I have never wanted to do anything with men and have always considred myself heterosexual. However, when I try to think of anything heterosexual in my mind I like the idea but physically the response isn't as strong or easy as it used to be back in the day. I hope this is just strong conditoning. I have watched porn since I was 13 and yes my porn tastes have escalated from vanilla, to humiliation, cuckolding and now really just looking at videos of blowjobs and imagining what it's like to give one or think about it. I am extremely worried and stopping now but Idk anymore if I have completely ruined myself.