Failed New Years Resolution

This past summer I finally decided to try and quit PMO. That’s when I joined this website. However, the last 6 months I’ve had absolutely no success in quitting. Honestly I haven’t even used this site since the day I said I was fed up and made my account. The longest streak I have had of no PMO was only a day or two. The first few months of trying to quit I’d constantly beat myself up for my failures. It got to the point where I decided that I had way too many other things to stress about (school, work, social life,...) to add the stress and mental strain of trying to quit porn. I accepted that I wasn’t going to get any better during the school year (21 year old in college) and that I should just accept my addiction and try again when I went home for the holidays. I figured it would be way easier that way.

The holidays have been rough for me. Without school/work, I have had far too much time on my hands. I’ve found myself PMOing multiple times a day, which durning the school year I never had the time for. Once the holidays started my addiction seemed to grow worse.

Seeing that I was even farther from quitting I decided that I’d make it my New Years resolution to go cold turkey on PMO. I figured I’d have my fun the last few weeks of the year. I hoped that setting a hard quit date of January 1st would make it easy to quit. I told myself “A solidified date, something set in stone is all I need to completely stop.” I’m really disappointed to say that it’s January 10th and I’ve only been successful 2 days (non consecutive).

Needless to say I’m finally realizing and accepting how hard quitting is actually going to be. I keep making excuses over and over and pushing my quit date/time period to later and later in life. I’m honestly realizing that I’ve been making the same exact excuses since high school. It’s like every single season comes around and I tell myself that “I’m going to quit next season. I’m too stressed or busy to try now. Next season It'll be easy to quit.” Well, it hasn’t been easy and I’m finally sick and tired of PM, my addiction to it, and my constant failure to quit it.

I personally have never posted on a forum like this before. I don’t even like or post on social media very much. However, I’m running out of hope. I want to quit, I really, truly do. I know that I need to not just for my sexual health but more importantly for my mental health as well. I just don’t know how. I need help. I’m not totally sure how but I’m hoping posting on this forum will somehow help me overcome my addiction. I’ve read enough posts to see this website works for people and I’m hoping that I can be one of those people as well.