Hi everyone! I would like to ask your opinions about opposite sex flatmate. I am 33 years old (christian) male, and recently I am looking for a flatmate. There is a (christian) girl who would like to live with me as flatmate, in my home. Is this ok for christians? I am not sure that this can be dangerous or not.
I personally would advise against living with the opposite sex, especially as a Christian. When living with other Christian men, you won't have the temptations and thoughts which will come if a Christian woman is living with you. It can be dangerous. If you happen to begin liking each other, it'll just get even more dangerous. Look out for her and protect her as your sister. Would you advise her to live with a man? Would you think it's in her best interest to do so? What sort of reputation may she get if she does? The enemy will try anything to make either of you fall. Be on your guard. This is the battle we're in so I advise you as your brother in Christ to avoid any such situation. Play it safe I say.
Yes I am. I have to admit, that some years ago we were kissing. However we did not make relationship since then. After that she said she does not want to date with me, she was just curious, like me. We shouldn't have to do that. Anyway, why is it wrong if we start a relationship, if we live together? We are both christians, and this would not be "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers". We are not unbelievers. (2Cor 6,14)
I've had female roommates before (flatmates to you). It can be fine. It does require more thought around using the bathroom and walking around with a towel, but it's...it's really nothing. If you started a relationship while you lived together, that...could lead to a moment when you might have to seriously question if one of you needs to move or if you need to get married, like, now. The hypothetical problems there would be when/how do you stop being physical when you share the same space, and living together like you are married when you are not. But this is all really hypothetical. In the short term, maybe talk about it with this woman, or don't. Personally, I think the couple story of "well, we really just wanted cheap rent and ended up in love" is pretty freaking cute. But again - this is all firmly in the realm of hypothetical and not existing. If you can stand being flatmates with her, then be flatmates. Expect a lot more hair in the shower and be ok with cleaning it out.
If by 'relationship' you mean "getting married, sharing all things and living together for the rest of your life" then nothing is wrong with that. The only lawful concept you find in the Bible of sexual partners is marriage. You already kissed her - if you are attracted to her, want to live with her, and already looking for reasons why this should be fine, then nature will most certainly take it's course, if you know what I mean. We can resolve ourselves to resist the temptation, but we know exactly that our weak human nature will "win" when exposed to continuous temptation. If you read that chapter, you'll see that it's talking about marriage. So again, if that's what you are referring to, then it's fine Those are the choices in life that we later look back to and think, "yes! I was faithful to God!" or else with regret, that we chose our interests above our relationship with God. We can have our reward now, in this life, or later, in the next.
