First post, 2 weeks in, nofap = awesome!

In a way I always realized I had a problem, but never thought it was 'that bad', in a way I kept fooling myself. Until I started seeing articles about what PMO does to my brain and how that translates to my social behavior and self esteem. My guess is that many people here will relate to that.

I got to NoFap after seeing a testimony about it from a gorgeous woman on YouTube. She is gorgeous and young, judging from her videos, a very talented, sociable and intellectual person. The kind of woman that keeps getting hit by men. It was a shock to learn that, a woman (!), a woman like that (!), has the same problem. Needless to say, YouTube suggests more videos like that, with more women doing the same thing. Not only a reminder that women are persons with their own sexual problems. But these women are doing something about it. If they can do it, SO CAN I, SO CAN YOU!

Start here:

Friends and family know me as someone who is very good at getting things done and focusing on the job. My job is technical and high tech (programming) and I am very good at it, winning innovation contests within the company. However: socially inept. I collapse when being confronted with beautiful women or someone with a higher status and/or hierarchy. I have a low self esteem and let people walk over me. Little did I know what may be the cause, so I blamed it on women (ex's) instead of on myself.

How bad was my addiction? With NoFap, I wanted to find out how bad it was. I wanted to start with one month hard mode and see what happens. Before NoFap, I read articles that watching P for more than 1 hour per day is 'a sign of addiction', so I am OK, right? Don't fool yourselves, people. Watching P every day is an addiction.

Two weeks in. After one week already, energy levels went up. Inspired by the NoFap, I started compiling a list of awesome things to do. Little things I should have done a long time ago but always kept postponing. Little things like: finally fix that plumbing yourself, buy solar panels and fit them yourself, call a friend and tell him/her you want to hang out with them and tell them how awesome they are, refurbish some furniture, etc etc. To my own surprise, the list kept growing and growing even when I get a lot of things done. Which is a good thing, because it is a means for me to deal with the urges. Whenever I get the flashes, I reach for that list and do something awesome. I was unable to get erections without P. Now I start to get erections during my sleep.

Situation now: my brain may start to adapt, because today I feel a sign of depression for the first time. I caught myself today, looking on these forums here for answers to the question whether fapping without P is OK after NoFap. I quickly realized that I was starting to fool myself again, looking for a way to get out. So I decided to write this instead.

You have set a goal. Others did it before you, and therefor, so can you! Go do awesome things!

 

Update after 21 days.

It is true what they say:

• You start to be more focused, to your surroundings and towards other people. People like confidence and it shows.
• In the past, I needed 9 hours of sleep during winter, less then that and I would feel like shit. Not now. Getting less than 7 hours sleep, and not feeling tired in the morning.
• Started to get wet dreams. Wonderful feeling though, especially if you manage to resist. Arousal could last hours, as if my body is begging to fap. Not going to happen.
• Still getting memory flashes from P. That is still a problem.

1 month goal is getting closer and I feel confident that I will make it. Wondering what I would do after that. Add one more month to my goal?