Hi, I'll start with an arguement: I think most of my struggles are related to melancholy type of temperament and all of its benefits and weaknesses. My story: Within company I feel most comfortable and good when I'm that silent guy who point his statements clear and loud. I don't joke around at all, I'm not loud and it's impossible for me to "feel the vibe, moment" to be driven by the moment. Most people I meet are opposite, tend to be extravertic and that's why I often struggle to bond strong relations(in general): I hate dance music(the one for mass events at least), I hate clubs, I hate bigger companies and in general loud places. It's just part of me. I prefer to have a few friends with whom I hang out. It took me years to accept the fact that I'm just built differently than most and I'm unable to enjoy what most people do: going out everytime there's an occasion, to giggle around for no reason, to be more spontanous, funny(happy?). One can say that it's unique, cool to be more introverted, mysterious but on a daily basis it's really hard. I think in general I feel a little bit less than most people do and this is sometimes reason why it's hard for me to fit in. I'm extremely vulnerable on criticism. I always enjoyed having me as my only company and that's why I always spend a lot of time alone. Taking that into consideration and my addictive personality I quickly became addicted to video games and PMO. I don't know why but I enjoy being sad. It's really weird but I kinda cultivate my melancholy states. I sometimes feel sorry that people are not capable of feeling catharsis-like feelings. Maybe it's because I'm deep inside really sensitive(and that's why I'm struggling with criticism a lot?)? Being sensitive is not sexy these days. I also tend to have depression-like states. I don't believe I actually had depression, ever. This is not complaining-type-of-thread. I'm now grown man and I know my weaknesses and I know how to deal with them and I accept them. I wonder if personality pays big role in tendencies to addictions because I feel like it's enormous part in my case. I'm smart, bright and I have absolutely no reason to feel like I'm behind my friends in any terms. However I'm not as social as they are and I personally treat it as my weakness because being able to socialise and get friends easly is really important in any kind of situation whether it's part of your genetics or not. And yes, we should and I do! Work on it: to be less shy, to try to be open minded but we can't fight the nature and my melancholy temperament would show up sooner or later. And to be clear: I don't struggle from social anxiety. Summary: Looking back into argument: I believe that our temperament, personality is something that can determine if we're more or less vulnerable to addictions. How we deal with people, how we cope with criticism, how brave we are - these kind of things can all be taught but genetics are big part as they're "entry level" in each part of personality. Do you consider yourself more introvert over extravert? Do you find it hard to build strong bond with anyone? And finally: can our temperament, type of personality, be reason for our struggles in relations with our friends?
in my opinion intraversion can favor addiction but only under specific cirumstances. First of all intraversion or extraversion are two attributes of human personality. Wether one personality is "better" than the other is highly dependend of culture and society. In our western society "extrovertic" attributes are in favor, for example open mindedness, communicative, loud etc. These attributes are connected with competence and attractivness. So it is all about the narrative you are told by society: If you are introvertic you are wrong. So introvertic persons are unprivileged and learn, not to love themselfes. So western capitalistic society teaches introvertic persons are worth less than extroversion people. And here we have a problem because introvertic people are conditioned NOT TO LOVE THEMSELVES. So if you are told your character is less worth, then of course your self confidence and self perception suffer which can lead to addiction of anykind as a cope mechanism. So i think introversion alone as a neutral attribute will not lead to addiction only in reference to cultural evaluation of introversion.
Thank you @resilient bastard for your reply. That puts another light into subject, really interesting!
