HOW TO GET PEOPLE TO LIKE YOU?

We could say then that we are in a CARE-TINE (? hahahah jk
Great tip the one of yours!

 

I'm sorry but I disagree. I was the kind of guy who wanted to be friends with people. I also tried to focus on the other rather than on myself. I also tried to make people feel good about being with me.


What's wrong with that?

You won't behave like who you really are but the way other people would like you to be. You won't dare say no if you don't agree with someone just because you don't want to be rejected. Just because you want people to like you. You'll drift away from who you are and you'll end up losing yourself. That's what happened in my case. Until I realized the only person I care about is myself. I want to attract people who love me for who I am. I don't want to be in constant need of outside validation. I want to be free. When I talk to someone, I don't want to be in my head wondering if I said the right thing and if that person still likes me.

You can't please everyone. The only thing that matters is to please people who like you for who you are. Without having to wear a mask. And for that, there's no effort to be made. You just have to be you and live your life. There's nothing wrong with hurting someone if you stay true to your values and who you are. That person will even be grateful to you. People who are too nice and look for techniques to please end up alone. People who are too nice are anything but nice because they act in a way that is based on others and are in constant need of validation. They're liars and they have no self-confidence.

I also read the book how to win friends and influence people by dale carneggie. I agree with certain principles. But the main mistake I think is to focus on the other person instead of yourself. I don't care if the person I'm talking to feels good or bad when that person is with me. I am who I am, I am authentic, I say what I think. And if that doesn't work, then that's the way it should be. That doesn't mean I don't adapt my behaviour to that person. There's a difference between social intelligence and wanting to please someone