I don't remember loosing my virginity

My first lay was awful, stayed with her for a year or so because I was too inept to find someone better. My second lay was over the moon and I still miss her ten years on. Were friends but she's married and I never see her in person. The rest have all blurred together and not one of them motivated me to quit looking at porn. Take an ear young fellas, there nothing about punching you V card or getting into a relationship that makes your desire for porn go away. The only times of my life I've been porn free was when my life was full of activities and friendships that kept me to busy to go looking.