I'm sorry but your 3-4 days streak will not reboot you in any way.

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by JWwantsalife, Jun 25, 2017.

  1. JWwantsalife

    JWwantsalife Fapstronaut

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    This was what I found out and concluded over the past few months being in NoFap. It's a harsh reality that I took a while to be at peace with.

    It may not even be 3 or 4 days. I concluded that it may even be 1 or 2 weeks for some people. The problem here isn't the days, it's the amount commitment and improvement you want to put in. That's the real problem.

    I've seen so many people here saying that they are stuck in their reboot, where they will relapse constantly in a 3 or 4 days cycle. I'm sorry to say this, but let's face the harsh reality. That's not rebooting. That is basically a porn addiction but just that the duration between each relapse is longer than your previous "more addicted" self.

    Notice how I used the inverted commas? That's because there is no such thing as being more or less addicted to something. If you're addicted, it means you're addicted. Relapsing in a 3 days cycle is just as bad as relapsing 3 times a day.

    "Why? But at least I'm not relapsing as often as before. That's improvement right? " Some of you may ask this. But no, that's no improvement. The only improvement I can see there is that you're able to tolerate the urges just a bit longer. But is that really what you're aiming for? Changing from 3 times a day to 1 time in 3 days?

    It may not seem like you're deliberately wanting to relapse in 3 days. In fact, you will be thinking that you're trying your best to keep the urges out. That's where the real problem comes in. Your commitment and improvement are not enough. You're not motivated enough to make the harder decision and say no to porn, and for that, you will never improve. You will never get out of this addiction.

    This was something I experienced myself. I felt so hollow, so depressed. I felt as if I can never improve. Then one day I finally came to my senses. I don't want to be stuck there forever. In fact, I want to have a better life, get better grades, get a girlfriend and just enjoy life! That pure motivation finally got me out of the 3-4 days loop. As of now, I'm in the middle of my 91days (13 weeks ) goal.

    I want you people to face the harsh reality that I did. You already did it once. You notice your porn addiction was a problem and came to NoFap for help. Let's face it again. Let's actually get out of this addiction. WE CAN DO IT!
     
  2. YngwieWanksteen

    YngwieWanksteen Fapstronaut

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    You make a good point of being frank and basically let's not coddle ourselves here. Along the same lines, it's my understanding that in general most people don't beat their addictions. I'm not saying using a certain program, just I guess the whatever it is to do it.
     
  3. SuperFan

    SuperFan Fapstronaut

    Most CSAT therapists say it takes a solid six months for the brain to really start healing itself, and sometimes up to three years before it has totally normalized completely.

    I completely agree ... 3-4 days is nothing as far as reboot is concerned. It's like putting a drop of water on your tongue and getting frustrated that you're still thirsty. I don't say that to discourage guys who have only been able to get 3-4 days--we all have to start somewhere, and I've certainly been there many, many times. But I'm not fooling myself to think that 3-4 days is going to bring me any superpowers.
     
  4. Headspace

    Headspace Fapstronaut

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    Well I have been stuck in my reboot for more than a year then. I'm not gonna deny that. Did an 8 month hard mode streak once, then relapsed. I have gone to 30 days and beyond four times by now. This year I've had an average relapse frequency which is about once a week. I still consider this a progress compared to my "more addicted self". I can even prove this by naming a measurable physiological progress, which is that I do not have these dripping issues after urination anymore.

    At the same time, I agree that my determination is not enough - this is indeed what it's all about, but it's also true that you can't just conjure it from nothing. I am hoping that it will become easier for me once I have a real job, but of course this is no excuse not to try and go for it today.
     
  5. JWwantsalife

    JWwantsalife Fapstronaut

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    I made this thread solely to allow people to come to their senses. Glad that some of you did. Sometimes being completely honest with yourself can bring you a long way when it comes to one's self-improvement.

    As to whether one can actually be fully recovered from this porn addiction, I believe that it is possible @YngwieWanksteen . Some of you can argue that people will still get urges even after months of no PMO and worse even relapse after so long. That is completely true. That happens and will continue to happen. However, do you think these people who have urges are still addicted to porn? No, they're not. What they're addicted to is just part of how nature works. Sexual drive. Nature makes it so that everyone will have a sexual drive, obviously to ensure the continuation of our species. And the longer they avoid and ignore those sexual drives, the more compiled they will be. So it's no surprise that people with 100+ days streak will still have urges.

    So what actually makes a person addicted? To answer that, we first have to look at the definition of an addiction. It is to be physically or mentally dependent on something. Now ask yourself, do those people with long streaks show any sign of dependency on porn? If they did, they wouldn't even have made it to whatever number of days they're in. So why do some still relapse to porn? Well that's something I'm not so sure of. If I were to guess, it's that these people are starting to lose motivation due to their specific reasons. And being porn addicts once, we seemed to go to porn when we are feeling stressed out or just want to feel better. Maybe that's the struggle people with long streaks have to face. They're being haunted by their past demons.

    But all in all, one can actually be fully recovered from porn addiction. Or put it simply, not be dependent on it anymore. However, as many of you know, it's just as easy to get back to the addiction after being recovered as compared to the first time you got into it. So I hope we all can still keep up our motivation and say NO TO PORN!
     
    YngwieWanksteen likes this.
  6. YngwieWanksteen

    YngwieWanksteen Fapstronaut

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    Oh, I agree with you. The more I learn, the more I realize I don't know what is possible!

    I've always been a bit of a devil's advocate, what I meant was the reality that most people do not beat addictions. Whether it is alcohol, porn, etc... I just mean like you and the 3-4 day streak, let's not look at this with rose-coloured glasses. Let's be real.
     
  7. Mixtec

    Mixtec Fapstronaut

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    So how do we snap out of this cycle? Tips and advice please?
     

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