Is PMO the root of your problems? Why do you nofap?

Porn is not the root of my problems, but it's a harmful activity that I sought comfort in for many years. I quit because I finally realized this. I feel better now that I quit. But like many others, I thought quitting porn and masturbation would make me all better. I completely ignored the fact that I am addicted to video games and the internet as well. Now I'm rebooting from all three. No PMO. No Vidya. Nosurf.

I now realize why the fourth position on the PMO tracker slider is labeled as - "meeting my personal goals." Because this is the ultimate challenge. NoFap is only a small part of it. We are never done improving.

 

Porn is definitely not the root of my problem, maybe it was in the past, but now I realized I was using PMO to cope with the void I have in my life, with stress, depression, it's just like a drug that you take to minimize the pain for a while. Ironically, I'm no longer interested in PMO as I used to and found out that PMO was the only thing that was helping me with stress.

 

You're stating that masturbation/porn is a coping mechanism, which for many people that's true. It makes them feel better just like drugs, alcohol, gambling, and all the other vices you mentioned. Even with a psychological addiction though, you still need to remove the product. I'll use gambling as an example. Gambling is akin to porn use as most professionals would not call it a "physical" addiction, but no one would suggest a gambler keep visiting the casino... That would be terrible advice! Yes, people need to get to the root of their problems, but it's not always apparent, and sometimes doesn't become apparent until the vice is removed. Sometimes a therapist is needed. I don't think anyone on this forum is saying you should not look inwardly and evaluate yourself, but it's kinda hard to do that when all your time is being occupied with pornography. It is a habit as you said, and that is why it helps to replace the bad habit with a better one, such as exercise. I'm glad you're saying NoFap is not a cure. It is only a tool, not a panacea.

Even with physical addictions though, there is STILL a willpower component involved. I have an uncle that is an alcoholic. He has been told he will die if he continues to drink, and has completed AA and rehab. Even after being sober several times, he CHOOSES to return to drinking. When he's drinking, he can blame all his problems on the "disease" and not take any responsibility for choices he's made in his life. I think some people are doing that with NoFap and PMO, and both are engaged in a self-pity cycle. I only point this out to show that once someone is clean and past the physical symptoms, there isn't much difference between the addictions. Both can truly believe they are victims of fate.

I'm not in agreement with you that this is a result of a technological, stressful lifestyle. Many people grew up in well to do households with great parents and started viewing porn out of curiosity in their teenage years. I know for sure I didn't start masturbating and watching porn because I was stressed... I do think it can turn into a coping mechanism, but that only means the individual cannot, or was not taught to cope with stress in a healthy way. Porn just hijacks that, or maybe it's a certain personality type that is more susceptible to it. I'm sure centuries ago this manifested in other ways. I do know that those with ADD are much more likely to engage in "addictive" activities, as their brains seem to naturally crave more stimulation than those without the disorder.