Keeping your calendar as clean as possible makes more sense than streaks.

The problem with streaks is when a lot of guys relapse they think they're back to square one, which isn't true. Another problem with streaks is it's more difficult to track your progress.

A good youtuber who knows a lot about this issue said to mark down your streaks on a calendar, if you relapse, and how bad the relapse was. He said try to keep your calendar as clean as possible, and always try to make sure you're making progress. So aim to make the following week cleaner than the previous week, and aim to make the following month cleaner than the previous month and so on.

I just use a calendar on my laptop. I use 3 different coloured crosses to determine how bad my relapse was. So a green cross is the least worst, then a yellow cross is moderate, and then a red cross is the worst. A green cross might be something like relapsing masturbating to an image for a few minutes. A yellow cross could be something like relapsing on social media for half an hour, or relapsing on a porn video quite quickly once. Then a red cross would be the worst, that would be something like masturbating to anything for longer periods of time, so over an hour or something. Usually it would be masturbating to porn or social media and it lasting over an hour, or hours or happening multiple times. Binging basically.

I have to decide my self how bad I feel like the relapse was and put which coloured cross I think down at the end of the day.

My aim is to make sure my calendar is as clean as possible, filled with loads of numbers from how many days I have not relapsed at all. But if there is a wee green cross here and there it's not the end of the world.

But I basically just aim to make sure my calendar is as clean as possible. As many numbers as possible is the highest priority, then no red crosses or as little red crosses as possible, then no yellow crosses or as little yellow crosses as possible, and finally no green crosses or as little green crosses as possible.

I feel like this is a much better way to track progress. I also feel like I will make better progress having this as my goal to make sure my calendar is as clean as possible. I feel like it's better than thinking I simply must not relapse and that's it basically.

 

Sorry but I disagree with you. I have had a few green crosses on my calendar and I have thought I don't want these green crosses to turn to yellow crosses, and this has helped me to stop.

I don't think it's ok to relapse. My main goal is to have no relapses on my calendar, having my calendar as clean as possible.

But on the other hand I think relapsing masturbating to one image for 5 minutes is completely different to binging masturbating searching and flicking about hundreds of different content for hours before you ejaculate. But the two of these seem to be put in to the same category. The damage from one of these would basically be minuscule, and the damage from the other one would be very damaging.

It's basically the difference between an alcoholic falling off the wagon and drinking 2 beers and then stopping vs an alcoholic falling off the wagon and drinking a litre bottle of vodka and then stopping. There is completely different damage levels from the two of these, and it's the exact same thing from what you relapse to, and how long you relapse. Now the alcoholic doesn't think drinking two beers is ok, but if he can look back on his calendar and think well I only drank two beers this month, then that's a lot better than if he used to get steaming drunk daily isn't it.

It's the same deal with porn. If I can look back on my calendar and think well I masturbated to an image for 5 minutes twice this month, but that's all I relapsed to. Then that is a heck of a lot better than PMOing for hours every other day.

I do believe the issue with streaks and not marking down how bad the relapse was is it isn't tracking your progress very well, and it is basically putting every type of relapse in to the same category. Like I said relapsing masturbating to an image for 5 minutes is completely different to masturbating to hundreds of different content for hours.

But I'm not saying masturbating to an image for 5 minutes is ok. Having a green cross on my calendar is not me having my calendar as clean as possible. My calendar being as clean as possible is me only having numbers on it and no crosses at all. But at least if I do relapse once like this I can think right I am going to make sure now this green cross doesn't turn to a yellow cross.

See the problem with what your saying is you want perfectionism. Of course everyone wants to be perfect and never relapse. But that can be very difficult to do.

 

My aim is to never relapse. But if I do end up relapsing then I aim to make sure the relapse causes as little harm as possible basically. So this means if I do relapse on an image for 5 minutes then I stop and that's it. I don't begin searching more content and masturbating to more content for hours. This is all I am dong.

But then maybe I could accidentally end up relapsing once and ending up on porn videos for half an hour or something. This sort of relapse would be a yellow cross. But then I would think right no way I want that yellow cross to turn to a red cross now, so this stops me from searching and masturbating to anything else.

Basically a green cross is making my calendar dirtier, a yellow cross is making it ever dirtier, and a red cross is making it the dirtiest. I aim to make sure my calendar is as clean as possible. So having my calendar as clean as possible is having no crosses at all. But a green cross is the least worst relapse, then a yellow cross is moderate, and a red cross is the worst.

If I could look back on my calendar over a month and have no crosses at all on it then of course that is the best. But if I can look back and have something like only two green crosses on it and that's it, then yeah this is still going to be really good to.

 

Yeah exactly.

I think a lot of people have one method, perfectionism, and that's the only method.

Using an alcoholic for an example, it's like saying an alcoholic relapsing drinking two beers is the same as relapsing and drinking a bottle of vodka. The drinking the two beers isn't going to cause anywhere near the damage of drinking a full bottle of vodka.

It's the same with PMO. Relapsing on an image for 5 minutes is completely different to relapsing on hundreds of different porn content for hours. But it comes across on this that a relapse is a relapse and everything is put in to the same category.

 

Yes but I also believe you can have significant enough brain changes even if you occasionally relapse. You clearly don't. You clearly think if someone went 30 days of no PMO and relapsed once that all the brain changes they have had in that 30 days have went back to how they were before the 30 days just from that one relapse.