killed one beast for another

Hi guys a little history I discovered nofap last November and after starting and stopping I signed up to the site fully in March hit a streak of 30 something days relapsed and pretty much haven't since which is great. The actual thought of masturbating now is one I just wont unless I'm very drunk entertain. This is good progress although I never get too cocky as that's how I relapsed previously.

So the problem is last month I drank a lot didnt want to masturbate so spent all night/morning when everyone else was asleep trying to find someone on tinder or pof with no success. Anyhow for the very 1st time i used an escort at like half 5 in the morning. I was more than ashamed didn't tell anyone even though I'm open with literally everything else now.

I'm a positive guy when I'm busy but right now money is tight I'm only working when I can get some part time. I left my last job because it was making me miserable think I'd be able to find anything else quickly. So far no luck so I'm having to be very careful with money.

So i used the same escort again this evening by finding the records on my phone I'm so ashamed I can't even patheticly blame alcohol this time.

So what I'm worried about is when I start working again full time and have disposable income I'm going to get into this disgusting overpriced shameful just plain sad habit. I've blocker and deleted all ties to this number but obviously I could just find another at some point in the future if I felt this low/horny again

Any advice would be greatly appreciated gonna post this on my journal to hold myself accountable even more so. I didn't say anything the 1st time partly shame and I thought I could write it off as a one off obviously not

 

Unfortunatley it happened again, ive started counting it as a relapse beyond that I cant think of anything