Hi Everyone, I have created an account just today for the sole purpose of getting some help on here. I have struggled with challenging and attempting to stop my PMO addication for quite some time now ( am 18 and first encountered P around 13 and it became a problem early last year) and it seems no matter what I try or how hard I try it always seems to make a return. A little about me: 18, M, play and love basketball, pretty intelligent, studious, generally ambitious and pretty social and well connected but unfortunatley single. Now to the addiction. I get to the point I really want to quit and I mean really want to quit, I know the harms, I know all the damages and have put all the precuations in place, filters on not only my main browser but all three and my phone, restricted browsing time, mimismised youtube and instagram consumption, attemped to make rules to stop it from happening e.g no phone in toilet, no laptop after dinner, got an accountability app on my phone, made a list of reasons to quit, watched every video under the sun to get educated and find stratergies and it just always seems that this addicted side of me always gets the better of me, part of me just feels like theres no point and I'm too weak to even bother fighting because its only a matter of time before I relapse. Everywhere I seem to look a trigger pops up e.g youtube, instagram or just a stray thought as I am going to sleep of "i wonder what..." "you think they have...." "woudnt it be sexy if..." frankly I'm pissing myself off. I really want to free myself from this and have commited myself through both prayer (I pray every night)and action but my willpower always seems to be diminshed by the intense urge and the stupid belief that "I'll just look at" or "I bet I can find P by searching....", particularly things like google images and instgram exlpore which act as a P substiute, don't tend to go directly to P. I have finished school now so I thought it would be easier when I didn't have to be always studying at my computer alone but now with all the spare time it seems just a matter of time before I get lured in. I know it is not God's fault but mine but I know there is only so much he can do without me helping myself. I really need an alternate perspective and to seek someone because I can't seem to tell anyone because of the shame that I feel. Usually I'm a really open dude and aren't afraid to talk things out but for some reason this is different. I hate being like this and I really want to change, please help!
Hey man, I'm also an 18 year old guy who's been trying to kick this addiction. I'd encourage you to PM me any time. Maybe we could help each other out one on one as brothers. One thing in your story that I'd encourage you to change is this view Of God that you have. "I know there is only so much he can do without me helping myself." That's not true man, God's power is not limited by man's choices or limitations. "So then it does not depend on the man who wills or the man who runs, but on God who has mercy." -Romans 9:16.
You mentioned that you have a lot of free time. Perhaps you could do something that will take away from the time you spend alone with your computer. Volunteer at an animal shelter/hospital. There are a lot of stray dogs and cats that could use your help. Make some soup for your friend or neighbor who is sick. Go to a forest and meditate. Pray and fast for the christian community. I think you get the point. Do something to occupy your time so that you won't be alone with your computer. You're not likely to view pornography when you're out helping your community.
