New here

Sup ma niggas? Im new here. I came here because when I masturbate it makes me feel like shit. I dont wanna feel like shit. My highest streak was 20 days about 2 weeks ago,now i do it on and off once or twice a week. By once or twice a week I mean 3-4 times in one day and then not doing it for the rest of the week. I dont know how to stop, im addicted to this. Some advise could go a long way. Those 20 days were the happiest days of my life coz I didnt feel like shit no more, give me some advice niggas and Ill pray for ya' all.
Ya' all experience the depression too? When I do it, it makes me unhappy. I have this feeling of something important being "out of reach" and no matter how hard I try I cant understand it or get the satisfaction. Its like trying to catch a rainbow. And it frustrates the hell out of me. When I stopped for 20 days I noticed it immediately that it was gone. It was like catching the rainbow. Ya' all know what I mean?

That feeling of contentness is more dearer to me than sex itself. If someone asked me what would I choose. Sex with a woman or losing masturbation addiction forever. I'd choose the latter, although I love women more than any man should. I'd choose women over food, over oxygen but not over losing masturbation addiction. I need to lose it cause I wanna be happy. And the only reason Im not is because I do it. I dont meet many people. Im a depressed, insecure sit at home freak with no energy, or emotional stability, my family(siblings and mom referred here) suffers because of my emotional outbursts. Im a man who needs help. Would appreciate some advice niggas.