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New with questions

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by browndog, Jan 23, 2024.

  1. browndog

    browndog New Fapstronaut

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    I'm mid 40s, married, with kids. My wife and I are in a rocky period. One component is that over the last 5-10 years I've been increasingly less sexually attracted to her. Her sex drive for me has always been higher than mine for her but its gotten really bad. I think we had sex about 5 times last year.

    Its not that I have no sexual interest. I've been using porn to masturbate ~3-5x per week for years. Its not a secret, she knows and has never complained or judged.

    In the last year or so I also have been curating an instagram feed that is increasingly pornographic. I don't usually masturbate to that but its sometimes the first thing I look at in the morning, and often when I am going to sleep at night.

    It has occurred to me that these behaviors might be fucking up my natural sexual response to my real life partner. The skewed fixation on young, perfect bodies has fucked up my view of my wife, who is aging but beautiful.

    So I've stopped the porn and the instagram for about almost a week now.

    It seems like most people's dysfunction here is tied to much more frequent porn use, multiple times per day, and often involves inability to maintain erections or reach orgasm. I don't have those problems---I can get erections, and when I do have sex with my wife, I tend to orgasm with no problem. Can I expect improvements in my interest and sex drive toward my real wife if I fully abstain? How long is it going to take?

    I'm committed to abstaining as I am clear that its not helping anything and could be harming my relationship. But I could use some input about what I can expect in my situation.

    Thanks
     
  2. runninginadarktunnel

    runninginadarktunnel Fapstronaut

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    you can try. no one can know though. libido is not only related with nofap. there are other factors too. vascular, hormonal etc... but I think at least you can try 1 month of nofap.
     
    Sarah-Walker likes this.

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