Sunshinestar88, I can attest to the fact that going PMO for any length of time doesn’t necessarily cause a reset or reboot. Like others have said his heart has to be in it, it has to be his decision. A few years ago, my wife issued a challenge to me to not PM for a month. I treated it as no big deal, and made her sacrifice her Starbucks. I would have also said no change, as I was just as committed to being able to go back to P. Honestly though we had such intense sex, probably some of the most connected and extended orgasms that it blew my mind. Even that life altering pleasure of great sex wasn’t enough to persuade me, because I was an addict. I proved to myself (and her) that I could stop at any time, and it didn’t matter to me. I didn’t even wait a day after the challenge was up that I went right back to the P that was still there waiting for me. Back to the habit, back to the disconnection, back to the self soothing of PMO. I can’t tell you what would convince your husband he has a problem, I know I was in denial, and full of shame of it all, and addicted to it. I can’t stress enough that it has be his decision, and he needs your understanding and support when he makes it. For me the catalyst for living a life free of PM was for my wife to find my collection of P that I hid in plain sight, and told her it was there. Once she knew the depth of my addiction by finding it, the secret was out, the shame released, the weight was lifted that allowed me to admit my problem and seek a better life of honesty and connection with a loving and supportive SO.
