No Repeats

Hi All, after a divorce where PMO played its part, I am now 8 years in to a loving relationship, engaged and some of the previous habits have started to return. I promised my other half that I wouldn’t O without her and have been pretty good over the last year but have always edged and enjoyed being hard regularly. I have also used anal self play to satisfy the same need. Looking at porn regularly without MO also featured.
I struggle a little with anxiety from time to time and this ‘go to’ works and I feel better when it’s infrequent but once it’s multiple times a day the shame really builds only making the problem worse. The more frequent it is the more I rely on P. If I do O (sex or M) the transition to PMO is almost immediate.
I have been avoiding sex and intimacy for a couple of months. My other half has not pushed anything as she tries to keep me happy and not add stress.
I Realise I have been doing this to create an excuse, using her lack of sex initiation as neglect of our sex life and therefore share the blame for the issue.
I now realise it is probably ALL me! And so need to talk to her and start this Nofap journey. Normal mode so that I can reconnect with my fiancé. Unless she thinks differently……currently using chastity cage whilst I am alone to break the habit for the first couple of weeks. I realise this will need to go eventually but I would just relapse immediately without it.
Anyway, wish me luck.