Open Relationships

True, but I anticipated it a lot and for me it definitely was a date, especially when I think about the way I asked her for it. It was the most accomplished way I ever asked a girl out: without any texting. On the other hand, I don't like the concept of "dating" that much myself, and I thought that may be she just wanted to get to know me in a more neutral way. As I said, she told me that she didn't consider it a date but told me as well that she doesn't think in this absolute sort of categories.

May be, but I didn't try to convince myself desperately of anything. I also do question a lot of things other people take for granted. I just tried to understand her "relativistic" view of relationships. May be it's more natural. Who knows? I like the position Teal Swan (who is monogamous) takes in this video. I am ready to have my worldview shaked every now and then:

That hurt is gone. The lessons learned remain. My date with the new woman wasn't my first one after this had happened. I had two more one year ago, and they were fine, but nothing more happened as I was about to leave the city. (One of these girls is still "on my list", though. She knows it and half a year after our date she expressed to me that I still was on her list as well. She's in New Zealand now and will return in six months. Originally, we said that we'll just wait and see how we will like each other when she returns.)

But I think that people are like own little universes with their own natural laws, and sometimes you'll have to be open-minded and non-judgemental to feel into the other person. That's what I tried with that woman. I can still keep to my principles, as I did, obviously. I just took some time to make my mind up instead of jumping to quick conclusions.