Overcoming Death Grip

Discussion in 'Porn-Induced Sexual Dysfunctions' started by my life again, Jul 22, 2019.

  1. my life again

    my life again New Fapstronaut

    Hi guys,

    So I currently have two main motivations: stopping PMO long-term (of course) and overcoming death grip in the short term. I couldn’t orgasm with my last girlfriend and since it was both of our first (few) times I think she became a bit self conscious and I only then started to realise something was wrong. I really want to overcome death grip by the time I date someone else but I’ve heard some conflicting opinions - some people say just wait several months without PMO (or at least 90 days), some people say continue MO with different techniques more frequently (I’ve been doing it dry for maybe 10 years, 21 now) and I’m wondering how I can possibly know which one works better? I’m thinking of potentially MOing with different techniques but spaced out over several months (say once a month or longer) to try and get the best of both worlds. It seems like a safe and intuitive way to test increasing sensitivity over time without the embarrassment of potentially failing with a partner... but it would also mean I reset a few times and frankly I feel like I’ll feel guilty if I MO even if it might contribute to overcoming death grip. Thoughts?

    If it helps I’m on 22 days right now, and in the last two and a half months I’ve only MO’d three times (usually two or three weeks in between). I’m also applying coconut oil down there every day since the start of my current streak
    tomboat101 likes this.
  2. tomboat101

    tomboat101 Fapstronaut

    Hard to say man. I’m trying 90 days of no PMO to see if that’ll help me. I sure hope it does . I would recommend trying one of the two techniques first, and seeing if it works for you. If not, try the other one. Good luck man!
  3. MarinoBigFan1984

    MarinoBigFan1984 Fapstronaut

  4. Chappie77

    Chappie77 Fapstronaut

    Years ago after reading about it in another forum I bought a fleshlight. I had deathgrip (Edit: causing delayed ejaculation during intercourse) for many years and it was one of my first attempts to cure it. Of course I was still using porn. The idea was to switch the sensation of the hand to something closer to a vagina. To get yourself used to climax with a less vigorous, more natural stimulation. I used it at a pace that would be realistic in sex.

    I found it really frustrating. First couple of times after 30+mins I would finish myself off with my hand in the usual method. Next time I was determined to orgasm with it.
    Again I was going for ages, contorting myself, cold sweat. And It happened, I PMO'd without deathgrip.
    But it was exhausting.
    I did it a few times after that, always with porn and always going for a long time.

    Then in some of my sessions after 30mins or so I started to lose my erection and would regain it with my hand to climax.
    I stopped using it soon afterwards.

    Maybe I might of got a better outcome if I did a 90 day hardmode nofap followed by a test session with fleshlight without porn.
    I'm not recommending this. I'm worried it may just condition me to climax with a latex sex toy.
    But it would be good to feel more confident knowing you can climax in a reasonable time and pace before intercourse with a woman. Thoughts?
    Last edited: Aug 18, 2019
  5. BumbleTheBee

    BumbleTheBee Fapstronaut

    Don't try this. Just strictly follow no PMO. Do away with MO permanently. I tried the same approach a few times and it hindered my progress. One time, it sent me into flatlining and one other time, it weakened my libido and morning wood.

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