Overwhelming desires! How does one stop?

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Mr X2226, Jul 4, 2019.

  1. Mr X2226

    Mr X2226 New Fapstronaut

    Hello everyone, I’m new here. I’ve been trying to quit masturbation and pornography for over 7 years now! Without success. The longest I’ve gone during these years is about two months. Recently I managed a month.

    I don’t want to do it mainly because of religious reasons, but also because I just feel dirty and disgusting afterwards and I feel like it takes away blessings from my life. I also just feel like it is wrong to do.
    Pornography I feel is wrong because by watching it, I’m feeding the industry and approving the objectification of women. I don’t want to think of women as sexual objects

    And that’s where I have a major issue. Everytime I see a woman, the first thing I think about is that she is a woman and check to see if she is attractive or not. If she is, then sexual images pop up and I think about the sexual tension and want to have sex with her. Now, imagine this happens everytime you see an attractive / decent looking woman. So whenever I go outside, in crowded places, taking the bus, etc I obviously get very overwhelmed because there are many women around and now that it’s summer they are basically half naked which makes it even more difficult. I honestly cannot wait to get home because it is too much! I try avoiding looking at them or stirring up desires but the desire is still very strong. I naturally have an extremely strong sexual desire.

    So I want to stop viewing women this way. I don’t want to think about sex whenever I see a woman, I don’t want to objectify her in that way. I also don’t want to have these sexual images. I feel like if I could view women differently then maybe that will help?

    The other issue is that I usually relapse during sleep. Usually, I suddenly wake up and find myself doing it when half asleep or not as aware as I am when fully awake. Or I wake up and notice a strong urge to masturbate / watch porn. While having this urge, I tell myself that I shouldn’t do it because of x y z but it doesn’t work. A part of me wants to satisfy the desire because constantly resisting the desire causes anxiety and I guess I just want a release. I try telling myself to stop but I just emotionally detach from the situation and end up carelessly doing it any way. Almost feeling like I have to do it and that nothing I say will work. But I know I’ll feel terrible afterwards.

    I should say that I suffer from constant undiagnosed fatigue, along with other physical ailments that I have not been able to fix. I also suffer from OCD which causes some stress. This might be a reason why I always feel emotionally numb. I can feel emotions but it’s cloudy...foggy and doesn’t fully penetrate through my heart. All these factors I believe contribute to my relapse.

    So how do you do it? Has anyone stayed free from masturbation and porn for months WITHOUT having sexual relationships?
    And based on what I have said, does anybody have some advice specifically for me?

    Thanks for reading. Looking forward to being active on here and hope we can help each other quit these habits.
    Last edited: Jul 4, 2019
  2. Hey & Welcome to NoFap Community! :)

    You are in the right place for recovery here. We are so glad to have you with us to beat this addiction together.

    You can go read some Success Stories in the "Success Stories" section to learn more about the benefits of NoFap , get useful tips and ideas to help you in the reboot.

    If you have any question about rebooting, you can ask it in the "Rebooting" section.

    And I would recommend you to make your own journal in the "Reboot logs" corresponding to your gender & age to track your everyday progress.
    You can also join challenges in the "Events & Challenges" section, to keep yourself motivated and focused.

    You may start by checking the links below:
    Learn more about Rebooting.
    Forum Usage Guide.
    List of Rebooting Ressources.
    Glossary of terms used in NoFap community.

    Best of luck to you in your journey!

    -The Winner
  3. Pointlessaccount

    Pointlessaccount Fapstronaut

    It's best to keep your phone and other internet devices out of your bedroom.

    It's good that you're saying "no" to the urge, but the next step is to redirect yourself to something better. Let's say you wake up in bed and you have an urge. You can quickly say to yourself "No, I don't want to do that" or whatever. Now, do something else! Perhaps turn the light on and do some reading. Or if it's time to get up, do that. Or even just deliberately think of better things. Don't get into a big debate with your urges.
  4. Hello and welcome! :)

    We are glad to have you as a part ofour community. Here are some quick links to get you started.

    Getting Started Guide | How to Use the NoFap Forums | Panic Button |Day Counter | Rebooting Resources |Forum Rules | Glossary

    If you wish to keep a journal of your progress you can do so in the appropriate section found here

    There are plenty of wonderful, friendly and knowledgeable people here tohelp you along on your journey to a life free of PMO. I wish you nothingbut the best!

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