Perception of women starting to change, but very lonely.

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Deleted Account, Jan 6, 2019.

  1. I just entered the flatline stage today (I think) and I just feel all sorts of depression, loneliness, and anxiety. I was thinking of masturbating to restart back into the surging stage, but I came here first and I do feel a little better now.

    There is a plus side to this though. Whereas before, I only really wanted sex, I find myself fantasizing about being in love. Waking up to someone that I can spend the rest of my life with and not to have meaningless sex, but to have it out of love for each other. I find myself getting aroused by women who are, not only physically attractive, but ones who are really caring and optimistic. This just screams "wife material" to me.

    This morning, I was really fantasizing about having a gf waking up next to me and us just holding each other and talking about spending the day together. Once reality set in though, I realized how depressing this situation is, to be "pretending" that I have a girlfriend.

    The old me would've saw this and been like, "GAY," but now I really do want someone to love and to love me back. Porn and masturbation addiction really does turn alot of guys into woman-haters. Incels need to really quit touching themselves...

    Any words of wisdom from anyone who's been to the other side of the flatline or overcame this lonliness would be really appreciated. Thanks.
     
    I'm So Over This likes this.
  2. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

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    The former you sounds that someone not very likeable. I fantasize about love too, I do not have any words of wisdom about that for my way to stop having those thoughts is to remember how I am alone and it is my fault.
     
  3. Yeah, you're right. I really want to become one of those good men that women wish still existed. Not for them, but for myself. It seems like a life dependent on honor, strength, and a strong set of morals.
     
    Susannah and Infrasapiens like this.
  4. Ra's Al Ghul

    Ra's Al Ghul Fapstronaut

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    Practice positive self development. Go out somewhere and get a bite to eat by yourself. Staying home staring at the computer will just make you feel lonely.
     
  5. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

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    Seems like we think alike about what we would like to become.
     
  6. I have an audio book written about Nietzsche and one of the things he talks about is becoming the person you are. You don't want to try and become someone you're not. That's a depressing thing, not being okay with who you are. It's more about accepting who you are, flaws and all, and trying to become a better version of yourself. What you think a good man is, should be a better version of you. Still you, just upgraded.
     
  7. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

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    I have seen people trying to mimic other behaviors badly to feel better about themselves and failing, it is unconfortable to see.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  8. Maybe they need NoFap? Even in only a few days, I'm actually starting to like my own reflection. I walk past the mirror and I'm like, "ooo who's that handsome devil?" LOL. It seems a little narcissistic to me, but I think it's only because I hated myself for so long.
     
  9. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

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    NoFap for me is a tool for people who want to become a better version of themselves, the intention of self improvement must exist in the first place. If someone tries to fool themselves to think they are better then they are doing nothing.
     
  10. Yeah that's really how it is isn't it? People arn't really trying to be superior to others, but to themselves. They can't accept the truth about themselves, let alone try to work on it, so they just invent a mask. They wear that mask for so long that they start to believe that it's really them. This is how I had my existential crisis. I was so convinced that I knew what reality was and when I found out it was fake, I couldn't tell what was real anymore. This is how people start to wonder if life is just some kind of simulation. It took a really long time for me just to to figure out how to make a "half-assed" attempt at life. That's where I'm at now, but I guess at least I'm fighting now.
     
  11. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

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    Seeing how something you believed in turned out to not be right is a hard thing to accept but it is necessary to anyone who wants to improve themselves.
     
  12. hollyman

    hollyman Fapstronaut

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    first congrats on unlocking benefit of nofap (different view to woman )and im just glad to find your post cause i do feel the same !!!! Im attracted not only to beautifull woman, but now im attracted to "wifey material"

    And i do fantazise abbout having gf but not in sexual ways, more like loving ways, feel lonely too knowing that only in my immagination.

    I cant giving u great advice since im not in better condition than you...but you know, dont be too hars on yourself, dont you realise that so many ppl out there strugle to get this benefit?

    Just be gratefull abbout this and keep goin
     

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