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Premature Ejaculation

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by Derkreator, Apr 21, 2017.

  1. Apr 21, 2017 #1
    Derkreator

    Derkreator Fapstronaut

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    Hi fapstronauts, well i have about 20 days without PM. My problem is the fuckin PE. When I used to watch porn I barely had to fap to cum. That kind of behavior take me to the horrible PE problem. I have a wife, I take this desicion to no watch porn because it bacame a priblem my mind was naughty all the time and with all the women. But also my sex life were bad, I became an PE. I cant get longer than one minute when I came. The sex were less and less with my partner and make me feel ashamed. Well Untill today I had 2 weeks without porn or masturbation and I think my problem was solved, but hell no. Today before I had my exercise rutine my wife wake up and we had sex. And were like the other fuckin times I cannot wait longer than a fuckin minute. I feel bad fellas. Shit, it's hard to keep myself without PM. But what is the fuckin bennefits? I think well maybe this time I could get longer having sex but it's not. Foes anyone have this problem, i feel bad. After finish sex and feel ashamed my mind said "hey so you don't have any progress so why do not see a little porn instead'. I don't want to watch porn but I really apreciate some advices or some succes stories about PE. Thanks.
    Prwmature Ejaculator
     
    Derkreator, Apr 21, 2017
    Derkreator, Apr 21, 2017
    #1
  2. Apr 21, 2017 #2
    i_wanna_get_better1

    i_wanna_get_better1 Fapstronaut

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    I had PE, DE, and PIED. It took about a month before those problems cleared up. Sometimes those problems will still crop up once in a while. Is your wife aware you are rebooting? My wife knew and that took a lot off performance anxiety away so if things didn't work right then it wasn't a big deal.

    Also, as I've gotten older I've noticed that I'm more numb down there in the morning and morning sex isn't as enjoyable as it used to be. So don't use morning sex as a measure of how much progress you are making.

    Also, don't measure your progress by how long you last. Don't compare yourself to male pornstars who last forever. The truth is that most men only last a few minutes. Spend more time on foreplay and learn to enjoy your time together and that will make your intimate time more satisfying.
     
    i_wanna_get_better1, Apr 21, 2017
    i_wanna_get_better1, Apr 21, 2017
    #2
    jack barnard and Derkreator like this.
  3. Apr 21, 2017 #3
    Derkreator

    Derkreator Fapstronaut

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    Thanks man, my wife don't know about any of my problems I'm so shy about those subjets. I feel sad to had no progress on my PE problem, speccially when is hard to not watch porn (the thing I liked the most). Well I think the hardest thing is not watch Porn Substitutes, they sorround me, on advertisings, on the beach, on my wet dreams,on comercial on TV, everywhere. So that my problem I think is a hard struggle to find any succes. But I'll be patient cause I know my anxety is what trigger me to PM. Thank bro
     
    Derkreator, Apr 21, 2017
    Derkreator, Apr 21, 2017
    #3
  4. Apr 24, 2017 #4
    ddinnov

    ddinnov New Fapstronaut

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    I'm in the exact same situation as you. I've had to go onto hard mode and shared with my wife what I am doing so she is supportive. What has slowed down my progress has been:
    1. Still fapping to fantasy in my head - even trying to slow it down and not O, doesn't make a difference
    2. Having sex with my wife - it keeps the dopamine/seratonin circuits staying as they are and the nervous system ejaculatory reflex.
    After a month or so of quitting P but still doing M and O I've realised that going hard mode is the only thing for it. We're taking it a couple of weeks at a time to make sure the relationship is in a good place and nothing is getting left unsaid or buried under the rug.

    The thing with PE is the more you think about it and stress about it the more it factors and gives you performance anxiety. You need to reset you nervous system ejaculatory reflex and change to a parasympathetic (relaxed in your body - the opposite of tense and fight or flight) state, get out of your head and be aware of your body, feelings, physical sensations and sexual energy.

    I'm doing a course on tantra (called tantra cure) which has lots of yoga type exercises, which you have to do very often for a long time (at least 8 weeks). I'm combining this with hard mode reboot, because I'm determined to fix this problem and come out the other end as a tantric love machine :)
     
    ddinnov, Apr 24, 2017
    ddinnov, Apr 24, 2017
    #4
    Derkreator likes this.
  5. Apr 24, 2017 #5
    Derkreator

    Derkreator Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for all the replys, I'm glad to tell about some little succes I had this weekend, first of all, I've been makin some changes in my life. Yes I reallize I'm a porn addict but also I detected some triggers who explode some feelings that make me more Porn needed. I like to smoke marihuana on a daily basis, after do my work and get home. Also I get serious drunk on Fridays, is my "free friends day". The problem that I detected was on Sarturday (my favorite day to PM), I feel so down and my body screams to go for some porn. This last Saturday I barely watch porn, I don't reallize but I was watching some no nudes but gorgeous women on Facebook, and keep that way untill I realized I was on P-subs. Imediatly I get to NoFap.com and push the emergency button. I saw a video about Determination, and I want to have determination in my life, for not watching porn but also for all things In my life who needs determination, those things are smoking weed and to get drunk on Fridays. I started this week, I dont have any weed with me and I'll try not to get out whit my alcoholic friends. All because they slow me down on my goal, all my goals.
    So this saturday I feel very very anxious. My head scream to watch porn, the time gets longer and I feel depressed. But in the night when my wife get at home and after we get tha baby sleep. We had sex, I took all the advices, like don't think to much on my PE problem, get more time on the foreplay and it works. Man finally after years I could find some progress, I didn't cum imediatly as always, I neither get as long as I wich but I had a serious success. I feel I'm in the good path here and is hard, but little by little I think I would have better benefits. Thanks all you fapstronauts for the feedback, and I apology for the bad English I have. Stay strong only for today fellas.
     
    Derkreator, Apr 24, 2017
    Derkreator, Apr 24, 2017
    #5
    i_wanna_get_better1 likes this.

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