Rebuilding my old self.

I'm 16 and this winter and spring I am trying to re-build habits that I learned last spring. Let me explain.

In the spring, I made a commitment that I would improve myself and my grades. I woke up at 5:00am every single day, meditated, and did not PMO for a month and stayed very strong. I worked out often and I studied hard and got great results. That spring I felt as though I was the best version of myself, I was proud and couldn't have asked for more.

However, after summer break everything was lost. I became lazy when I lost my cause for hard work (school) and lost the habits of waking up early, working out, meditation, and I couldn't keep a streak for more than a few days!

This past fall, I was trying to find my old self that was lost during summer break, but the only thing that fell in place was waking up early, as it isn't too hard for me (however, I know it is hard for others and I hope you too can build this habit!). I stand now at the beginning of J-term wanting to build the same habits that I did in the spring, and most of all to not PMO for a good amount of time.


I remember when I used to abstain, that I felt so free. When I saw someone I liked, I could see right through the visual aspect of liking them and cared more about who they were as a person rather than their looks. Sexual images prominent in today's advertising as well did not affect me. When I had an urge I did not act u I want to find my old self that had the ability for self-control and could maintain habits with ease as well as build new ones quickly. I want to start all of this by avoiding the habit of masturbation and moving on to things like working out daily, meditation, studying every day and so on.