Sexual Frustration - How to Overcome it?

Embrace it! NoFap is about getting off porn so you can live your life to the fullest, and that often includes the company and affection of women. Rebooting is meant to clear your mind of porn, but you gotta fill it up with positive sexual/romantic experiences. Socialize as much as possible and be flirty when appropriate, and see where things go from there. Just talking to women is a great way to calm urges and stay away from porn. Dating and sexy times are also surefire ways to kill urges, but actually condition your brain to find them more rewarding, making you less addicted to porn over time. It's a win-win. It may be scary flirting with women and being in a relationship when you haven't before, but they're so fun. See where things go!

 

I can't relate to this. Yes, I am also sexually frustrated during the first 10-12 days on a streak, but after that, I have no urges whatsoever. I have the opposite problem: how to stay attracted to women when I have very long streaks?

In hard mode streaks, I lose all interest for P, MO, and real women. Have you ever tried hard mode? It kills libido completely and makes streaks very easy. The only reason I still relapse is not because I have urges, but because it brings back my libido until I go into another long streak. Consider yourself lucky. I prefer to have urges than to feel dead.

 

I've been sexually frustrated since 2014. The way I put up with this is just by putting up with it.

 

They come back in time. When you start dating and making out again your brain remembers how good it is and gets really excited very easily

 

I have the same problem as @Flying High. I hope you are right. I hope when I really meet the right person, I get all this libido back. I have super strong libido. And when I do hard mode noFap, it just goes completely flat. Sometimes I think, should I not go hard mode, and may be just refrain from P. But then, since I have already tried hard mode, I keep going back to trying it the hard mode way.

 

From YBOP's HELP! I quit porn, but my potency, genital size, and/or libido are decreasing (the Flatline)

"The good news is that it will pass, and your libido will come back. Everyone’s recovery is a bit different, though, and it is not necessarily linear. Even after you start to notice signs of life, it’s quite normal to see them followed by phases of sleepy-libido before you are completely back to normal. A few men with longer reboots experience a return of libido for a few weeks, followed by a few weeks of flatlining libido, or several of these cycles."

"
Beneficial stressors include cold showers, exercise and fasting. For a scientific discussion of why these mild stressors can improve mood and increase sensitivity to pleasure and satisfaction, visit www.GettingStronger.org.

If recovery or your flatline is taking a long time see – Started on Internet porn and my recovery from porn-induced ED is taking too long"

It'll come back. It comes back for everyone

 

I believe you, but for me and some other rebooters, there is nothing there for the brain to remember. When you've never dated or never had a SO except for MO... It's hard to believe that a couple of weeks of abstinence can easily destroy libido but that's my experience. I'm hoping it eventually turns around.

I do all of these. I'm in the best shape of my life and have been fulfilling many personal goals. Everything is great except libido.

 

get in control of your mind and body, learn to breathe

 

I believe the advice applies regardless if one has had sexual experience, very little, or none at all.

You have to start somewhere. And apparently the brain can simply stay in limbo with libido, until we 'kick start' it with human interactions and touch.

Like learning to ride a bike, you literally have to push yourself to practice a bit and accept it will not be that amazing at first. But also like riding a bike, one day it will just 'click' and you're all good!

 

During your first intimate and sexual experiences with women, you will probably be a little nervous and awkward. That's how everyone is. You might not get a very hard erection, and you might not be hard at all during sex. It's totally fine, it happens to everyone who recovers, even me.

I was a total virgin before my first reboot, and went through the loss of libido too. After my reboot I tries having sex, even though it was a little awkward, I wasn't super hard, and it didn't feel great. Over time though I conditioned my brain to like it more, and I got harder and experienced more pleasure over time. Ever since then my libido has been absolutely jamming and has never stopped (except during relapses, but it always comes back).

I know it's scary, but the temporary loss of libido is just part of the healing process. It may take some time, but it will come back and you will enjoy sex.

 

During your first intimate and sexual experiences with women, you will probably be a little nervous and awkward. That's how everyone is. You might not get a very hard erection, and you might not be hard at all during sex. It's totally fine, it happens to everyone who recovers, even me.

I was a total virgin before my first reboot, and went through the loss of libido too. After my reboot I tries having sex, even though it was a little awkward, I wasn't super hard, and it didn't feel great. Over time though I conditioned my brain to like it more, and I got harder and experienced more pleasure over time. Ever since then my libido has been absolutely jamming and has never stopped (except during relapses, but it always comes back).

I know it's scary, but the temporary loss of libido is just part of the healing process. It may take some time, but it will come back and you will enjoy sex.