I’m just so depressed with struggling from pied that my life feels hopeless. I feel like I’ll never be cured because I’ve been at this for so long. I hate myself for getting addicted to porn and not realizing my erections were deteriorating over the years. I’m sick of all the negativity surrounding this issue and I want to be happy but I can’t help but think about all the relationships I’ve destroyed because of my problem with pied. I’ve gone 8 months no porn and have done two hardmode streaks of 45 days and 70 days separately. I wasn’t even addicted for that long (5 years) and I would never do more than 2 times a day. At the end of my pmo days I wouldn’t even get aroused to porn I would just do it because I thought it was a normal thing to do daily. I can’t believe I let myself down this hole and I feel like I was in a flatline before even starting a reboot. On day 70 hardmode I felt almost cured and nearly cried because I was so happy but then one bj sent me back into the flatline.