The Last Virgin Remaining

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Deleted Account, Dec 26, 2017.

  1. Physicist

    Physicist Fapstronaut

    want to have the most interesting conversation? talk about them!

    you have interest in the conversation, you are practicing. having no means you dont even want to practice. if you aren't preparing yourself with small conversations throughout the day, how are you going to be prepared when you see the girl you like. in a sense, its selfish for you to think that because there is nothing for me to get out of this, i wont bother.

    talk about them, make them feel good, all it takes is two lines of encouragement to brighten up someones remedial routine day. GIVE GIVE GIVE, thats your new interest.

    and practice is good. just ask with genuine interest "how was your day", when they "good", fire back with a big smile "its always good, really, tell me how was it"

    i did it once and they laughed and said "wow haha well, its been quite tiring, lot of customers, bitchy customers, so much work, havent had anywhere to sit..." and one they went for a minute or two. i replied with obvious sarcasm "that does sound like a really good day, you should teach me how to have days like that" and they laughed

    make friends with the people in places you frequent. turns you from just a regular customer to a guy who gets regular freebies and personal service. I got regular staff discounts because of it.
  2. dugong89

    dugong89 Fapstronaut

    Hello all.
    I am in the same boat as you guys, but longer. I am 28, still a virgin. Not bad looking, but just circumstances like PMO I guess, having bipolar (mild) which made me feel low a lot, etc. I think I was always afraid that I couldn't cope with a relationship and kept thinking that I won't be able to deal with the emotional ups and downs, eventual breakups which I knew would happen. So I waited for the "right girl." Obviously she didn't just drop from the sky. The one relationship I have had was for a year, that was when I was 23. It was a bit messed up from the beginning, but it was nice enough at times. Not the most satisfying emotionally (I had an emotional breakdown when I found out about something that she had done). Thankfully not tumultuous at the end. Didn't get to do anything sexually satisfying for reasons that are too complicated to bore you with. But my advice to you is, try not to get into a relationship or do anything with anyone just for the heck of it if you think you won't be able to cope with it. It's perfectly alright to explore or fool around if you can not let it affect you or the other person. I personally don't think that it is immoral to do something like that. Just be stable, strong, and assertive. Don't get taken advantage of in anyway, emotional or sexual. This is for both girls and guys. Don't do something or hang on to something because you think that it is your only chance at a relationship or some experience. People tend to think that the first time. I did.

    Now I am trying to build confidence so that I can actively pursue women (too old for girls now I guess). But, believe me, 20, 21, or 25 isn't that bad. You guys have time. Build confidence. You are doing the right thing by coming here and starting off early. I only got to know about nofap a year ago, but it has helped me immensely. I'm still struggling, life is getting harder as time passes, but I can cope a bit better. You'll be fine.
  3. Xander_

    Xander_ Moderator Assistant Staff Member Moderator Assistant

    I am also a 20 year old, virgin, never dated anyone. Except i am a guy. And i tend to feel lonely as hell, it happens. But, actually feeling that way is good. PMO addiction just numbs down our feelings and isolates us and we don't even recognize it. Feeling lonely is basically a small indicator that your brain is healing and is in need for human connection and contact. By the time you start to progress in getting rid of PMO addiction you will automatically look forward to meet new people and in the meanwhile start a relationship.

    I am a guy, and i was even teased by some of my "friends" because i never was in a relationship, or because i am a virgin. It used to bother me and throw me into a deep depression and bigger loneliness. But, as time was passing by, i stopped bothering about it. So i am focusing on kicking out PMO habit, and i know that relationship, losing virginity, meeting people and so on will come right on time. You should not worry, its going to be okay. Loneliness is just one form of feeling we were all numbing down to porn, majority of us have to taste it and go through it until we finally manage to get out and enjoy life.
    Deleted Account likes this.
  4. Shaque118

    Shaque118 Fapstronaut

    See I have a similar story except I’m twenty one. My problem now is gaining enough confidence to get out of my comfort zone and making the first move with any person. Even if I go out to public places I end up not staying for too long and sit in isolation.
    dugong89 likes this.
  5. DeProfundis

    DeProfundis Fapstronaut

    Learn to love with the heart and mind first, the body can wait!
    CBook and Hitto like this.
  6. Hitto

    Hitto Fapstronaut

    Keep doing that I'm working on it too before I use to be so nervous in my head and waste so much mental energy about the interaction without taking action now I make peace with this nervousness acknowledge it by breathing and feeling the energy in my body and try to calm it down and now I don't focus on so much what to say because all these matters is my breathing and relaxing my body and then your unconscious true self shines and then you are happy that you even took action and then the outcome becomes inconsequential
  7. Hitto

    Hitto Fapstronaut

    Think of it as a way to connect with a follow human being and make their day much more enjoyable I try to use humor and when people mess up or things go wrong I try to be courteous and understanding the way others treat you says a lot about how throb treat themselves and the more you do it the less fake it feels because you are coming from a place of love and not fear how can I make this persons day easier or a lot less stressful

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