The Main reason why being rejected by a girl should not be taken personally

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by TIMMY0110, Sep 13, 2018.

  1. TIMMY0110

    TIMMY0110 Fapstronaut

    Hello Everybody,

    In the dating world there is a lot of pressure on men to find a girl. I personally don't think we have to find someone because of societal pressure. Start looking for a bf/gf only if you feel that you are ready for a relationship.

    Coming to the questions.

    70% of the times men are rejected by women when we approach. The reasons for the rejection could be.

    1. She really has a boyfriend and doesnot want to cheat on him, even though she found you cute.
    2. She was recently in a bad relationship and it ended badly. So, she might need some time to heal.
    3. She might be worried about submitting her college assignment or Exams. So she doesnot have the eneregy and the patience at the given moment.
    4. She might is married or a lesbian.

    5. Or Million other reasons.
    *6. Or she might not be attracted to you.

    Even though there are various reasons why you might be rejected........our brain focuses on only one reason (she might not be attracted to you.)This is when we tend to take rejection personally. However, before you do that, stop and think for a moment. There is no way of finding out the real reason for the rejection(in most cases). So, why assume the worst case scenario?????. Why assume that she rejected you for reason 6. It could be because of 5 other reasons.

    So, don't take rejection personally.

    Feel free to agree, disagree and comment.
     
  2. SanctionedUser001

    SanctionedUser001 Fapstronaut

    Totally agree man.Very good opinion about relationship.
     
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  3. TIMMY0110

    TIMMY0110 Fapstronaut

    Thanks John......It was not so long ago when even I would take rejections personally. No matter who you are, rejections always hurts. No one wants to be rejected. But thats part of life, isn't it.
     
  4. SanctionedUser001

    SanctionedUser001 Fapstronaut

    Yaa...I know man how it feels.One of my friend has faced a break up with a girl.So he went into depression like 1 or 2 month.About myself so i dont think i m ready for any relationship with a girl so I am single rigt now.Btw ur 6 point was really true especially 1,2,3 point.
     
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  5. TIMMY0110

    TIMMY0110 Fapstronaut


    haha....btw watch this video. I did that the 30 second challenge

     
  6. SanctionedUser001

    SanctionedUser001 Fapstronaut

    Thnxx man....I watch it...
     
  7. Castielle

    Castielle Fapstronaut

    I would like to add that even reason number 6 should not be taken offensively and it should not make you feel bad about yourself. There are so many people out there in the world. You are not going to be attractive to every single one of them, and the good news is, you dont have to be. If you want to find someone to settle down with, then all you need is one person.

    I've met plenty of people who are attracted to me or have expressed interest in me. However, I've also had experiences of being attracted to someone and wanting to date them and having them say no. Its painful and sad for a bit, but at the end of the day, it doesnt mean anything is wrong with you, and you shouldnt jump to being offended. Everyone has different preferences, looks wise or personality wise, etc, and even the hottest guy in the world isn't going to be accepted by every single girl he meets, because everybody wants different things. So try not to feel offended or hurt every time someone rejects you because you aren't their type or they're just not interested in you. That's fine. Go find someone else who is.

    Even if it is number 6, its still not really "personal." Its about her and what she wants, and you dont have it. There are plenty of things you dont have, and that's perfectly fine. There are plenty of things I dont have either, and I've met tons of people who I found very attractive or interesting, but I knew I would not be a good partner for them, because I dont have the qualities they need and are looking for. I think its important and healthy to recognize that and not let it effect your self esteem. You dont have to have everything.
     
  8. Castielle

    Castielle Fapstronaut

    Another one I would add is that they might not be interested in dating some person they dont know. I know plenty of women, myself included, who would pretty much never say yes to a stranger, because they're looking for something real and they dont want to waste their time going on a date with someone when all they know about the person is that they're cute.

    I know number 5 encompasses this, but I think it's a common enough one that it should be recognized in it's own category. I see a lot of times guys getti f upset or offended by getting turned down, and a lot of times they seem confused as to why they would be turned down if the person isn't in a relationship or something. Like that's the only reason someone has to turn you down. But most girls I know aren't really interested in being picked up at a bar or a coffee shop. They want to find someone more organically, after being friends for a while, and they might even already have a person or a few people they have their eye on who they're already friends with.

    For myself, personally, I dont date anyone who doesnt have the same religious beliefs as me. So theres only one time in my life I ever would have said yes to a date from a stranger, and that's because I was wearing sweat pants that had the name of my Chrisrian university on them, and the guy started talking about them and the school and he was clearly a Christian as well. I was married already, so I politely declined his offer, but if I wasnt married I probably would have said yes.
     
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  9. TIMMY0110

    TIMMY0110 Fapstronaut

    Thanks a lot for bringing the women's perspective to the topic. I have seen several posts of yours. Realised you were a woman just now.

    Adding to something you have already mentioned:
    Lets say I go to a bar...and there are a dozen women. Out of them, I find one of them cute, so I will approach her (lets say). This would mean I have mentally rejected the other 11 women out of the 12.(I don't mean to be rude). When I have the option to choose 1 out of the 12 women, then its only fair that the cute woman has the privilege to reject me choose someone else other than me (lets say she can choose 1 out of 12 men who would have approached her and reject the other 11). I hope my explanation made some sense.


    Again.....feel free to agree, disagree and comment.
     
  10. Castielle

    Castielle Fapstronaut

    Lol yeah, that happens. :p

    Yes, exactly! Rejection doesnt mean theres anything wrong with the person. We just all have different preferences, and we can't be "the one" for everyone.
     
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  11. torrace

    torrace Fapstronaut

    This sums up everything!

    Within one year, I dated 13 women (no sex, most of it was getting to know them, going for activities). And yes I was rejected by half of them. The other half, I knew that there was no future, so it just ended on its own. Sure rejection sucks and knowing that you have start over from ground zero is tough but such is life! If I had given up, I probably wouldn't have met my wife. Stay strong people!
     
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  12. ghalib

    ghalib Fapstronaut

    42
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    100% true
     
  13. ghalib

    ghalib Fapstronaut

    42
    18
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    facts
     
  14. Ra's Al Ghul

    Ra's Al Ghul Fapstronaut

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    Wow, so theyre even picky about "how" they want to meet the guy.
     
  15. Coolyorky

    Coolyorky Fapstronaut

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    A friend of mine always gets laid. He has a don’t care scatter gun approach and tries it on woth most women. It is wrapped up in a degree of charm. He doesn’t care about rejection haha
     
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  16. Castielle

    Castielle Fapstronaut

    Yep, as they should be. If I wouldnt get in a strangers car because its unsafe, why on earth would I agree to go on a date with one? Sorry you cant handle that some people have standards, but it's not wrong of them to care about that.

    Also, it's absolutely ridiculous that you took my long post trying to encourage men not to feel hurt by rejection and boiled it down to one small point to make a sexist comment that makes it sound like women are uptight for not wanting to just pick up any old guy off the street that they know nothing about. If that's how low your standards are for dating, then you do you, but its perfectly reasonable to want something more than that.

    You also misquoted me by taking out the rest of the post, because I didnt say that all women want that. Plenty of women would say yes to a date with a stranger. I was clearly talking about certain women, and I was doing so to be encouraging and kind. And in return, I get this misogynistic crap. How fun. Being a woman is great. I can say the kindest thing, all about encouraging men, and some man can still waltz in and turn it into "women suck."
     
  17. Ra's Al Ghul

    Ra's Al Ghul Fapstronaut

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    Oh gosh, reading into everything that I never implied. You sound like the one who couldnt handle it with your long diatribe reply. Lol, Wow. Talk about triggered. Way to play the victim. Charlie Kirk's recent piece was right, women are doing a hundred times better in the USA than men, but the feminazis will never admit this openly and cry about patriarchy.
     
    Last edited: Nov 18, 2018
  18. Castielle

    Castielle Fapstronaut

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