Tips for getting out.

For people who are recovering from the sissy/femdom/humiliation line of porn

  1. I'm placing this here because I pretty much wrote a book for @markbr but it got deleted because of the character limit in the comments. So here goes. This thread is for posting all the tips you use to get out and away from sP. I'll start.

    I have about 14 days under my belt so I think I have at least a semblance of qualification to give some tips here. The thing that has helped me most is - stay busy.

    It really isn't a buzz phrase people use on this site. It's the - rats cant get addicted to cocaine if they are doing regular rat things with their regular rat buddies - sort of philosophy. I will give you an example by taking my day.

    I force myself to wake up at 5:45, then I do mouth wash, get a glass of water, check notifications here, then do my anki japanese flash card deck reviews, then I do half of my kanji practice, then make flash cards out of the unknown words and sentences I collected last night, then I do chores, then I cook breakfast, then I check my school (though I just finished so I wont have to do that anymore) then practice for about 2 hours on guitar, then eat lunch, then read my favorite linguistic blogs, then read books (my currents are the bible, road to wigan pier, and the inner game of tennis), then talk to friends or if I can go out, then work out, then do evening chores, then eat dinner, then do the other half of my kanji reviews, then do any flash card reviews, then find more sentences in japanese media to make flash cards with. Finally I put my phone away on my bottom bunk, then go to sleep without it. Take all of your empty time and take it up with something you suck at until you start not sucking at it and add more things on from there.


    Also, STAY AROUND GOOD PEOPLE.
    I was just going to say people, but I remember how my friend was telling me about how a lot of his friends will watch porn en masse or you know be just plain gay to each other (in the lame sense, gay people are alright.) So I corrected it to good people. If you stay around people who actually care and will do good for you it will help you tons. If you live with your family leave the doors to your room open, if there is something you can do out loud on in their presence, do it. I find It's really hard to make time to fap when around people constantly. Also people will notice you aloof and might ask you to do something, so It might be a strategy to keeping busy, instead of hiding in your room unseen.

    Finally: Don't let your brain fool you. When you are doing good your brain will tell you the following, "hey, your doing really good, you might be "straight" again, let's check just one last time to see if you get aroused." This is a lie. The only way you will ever get your sexuality in order is if you are in a clear mind after you are not addicted anymore. The only way to become un-addicted is by starving the circuits of addiction and the surrounding supporting circuits. Don't even be tempted, don't watch arousing stuff. For example I watch japanese new, game shows, and kid shows in my spare time, nothing arousing about Doraemon just good clean fun.

    Anyways that's all for me, I gotta do my anki reps and japanese and stuff.

    See ya'll and feel free to comment of course.
     
  2. I am posting this as a follow up to my conversation with @Viscardo_Delarosa and @RingoRules. This is a post a while ago that outlines my thesis for getting out of this genre of porn.

    Day 18 everyone. This is the longest I have ever gone with out PMO. I'm starting to flatline for real this time, though I still am having little urges. While I did have a handful of urges, I easily conquered them, they weren't as strong as my will. There is something I'd like to post here, that I posted in my discord server that I would like all you on the nofap platform to see.

    In response to a person on the server wanting to know if he could get rid of it.

    "Psychologically of course it's possible to get rid of this! :) Though you really have to treat it like you would smoking, alcohol, or drugs. You need to either negatively enforce the circuits of addiction and the surrounding circuits or starve them. What I mean by circuits are the feed back loops you have created watching this porn. Here is how one would typically fall into those circuits. First surrounding circuits, >go to the bathroom< >thinking masochistic feminine thoughts< >picking up phone< >seeing women's clothes<. Primary direct circuits would be things like, >watch sissy porn = masturbating = dopemine = watching sissy porn< >wearing women's clothing = watching sissy porn = masterbation = dopimine = watching sissy porn = big release.< We as "addicts" of sissy porn however can not really use negative reinforcement (depends on the person though) to solve our addiction. We need to instead starve these neural circuits. What I mean is simply quit porn and let the following neural plasticity take place. We have wired our brains to think that things that are not inherently sexual (womens clothing, bags, shopping, girl like behavior) and things we wouldn't desire to be sexually attracted to (I don't want to get too triggering, you can imagine the transexual and homosexual things advertised in this type of P) and wired them to our masturbation = dopamine = pleasure circuit. And not only that but we have done this with surrounding actions and for a SUSTAINED PERIOD OF TIME. So try to cut most things sexual out of your life. However the longer you have gone on the worse it will be but you can still get out.

    Funnily enough I started writing this for this person in order to help them but in many ways It tricked me into helping myself. I also had to do some research, which made me more informed on addiction too. I now have a new confidence, too, I just admitted out loud that this is possible and given myself a scientifically accurate method out. I have now, no excuses, and it feels... liberating. Knowing this hasn't made my urges go down but it makes me stronger in my conviction. It's not that there is vague relapse thing and if I do it it's bad. No it degrades, I need to literally get this out of my memory, and I cannot relapse in logical conscience. I know all it will do will make it longer, and if I don't want it to get worse thus I cannot prolong it.

    I also had some further talks that I would like to share. The person I was talking with asked me this.

    "Wow dude, thank you for the detailed explanation, it's already worth joining in! So if I understand it correctly, I not only need to get rid of the porn, but the stuff as well that triggers the cravings. So next step is to observe and collect these triggers. Do you guys already have a list of these stuff?"

    I then responded For person's question, this is a little embarrassing for me but I'll share to make a point. The surrounding triggers are different for every body, but I'll share mine. I in the height of my sP addiction I did a lot of aM (I'm not going to say directly, figure it out) . So my triggers are two-fold, pooping was and still is a sub circuit for me, merely looking and touching the soap bottles I used is a triggering topic, even washing myself in the showering was triggering (though I shower so much now, I no longer have that trigger), and even coconut oil. Also the other triggers are when I'm doing stuff like my sister's laundry, or opening a private window on opera or safari. Basically anything that was used as the means to get that sweet sweet dopamine will be used as a subcircuit, in fact our hole addiction is based of our brains being heavily altered by subcircuits. This sP ain't natural, though It has connectors like regular porn of women to connect dopamine to "c*** worship." You don't have to get rid of the things that triggered the cravings just be around them and use them with out the result, dopamine. For example sometimes if I am feeling strong and really non-urgey, then I will re-organize the bathroom cupboard. It's not that you need to throw them a way, and I would say actually don't, just start to use them and operate without them being connected to the dopamine, the neural plasticity will fix itself. There still is some more stuff but that's the basic idea."


    Though this is my plan. I'm going to keep going, keep winning, and keep taking porn out of my life.

    Thanks everyone for stopping by.

    Day 18
    Out
     
  3. Also here is the link I wanted to originally send.

     
  4. for_change123

    for_change123 New Fapstronaut

    4
    12
    3
    I don't know if I'm at liberty to give some tips here to get out of the cycle of sP. If I'm not just message me and I'll delete this post. Anther tip that I find useful and was given to me by someone is to find someone who will hold you accountable for your actions. Like a really close friend or a family member who you trust to tell about your struggles with this addiction and to help you out. Then you aren't fighting this alone and if you ever feel like relapsing then they can be there to help you. I also find that putting porn blockers on your phone and computer and deleting tumblr and other apps like that will help fend off the urges to go back to sP. Also like @Maninsearchofasoul said stay around good people and don't be afraid to speak to someone about this. The last piece of advice I have for everyone is keep fighting it may feel like walking through hell but just as the saying goes "It always rains before a rainbow"!
     
  5. CieroWake

    CieroWake Fapstronaut

    25
    38
    13
    About the triggers, today I ate a banana. My toughts wandered off a bit and I'm pretty sure you guys can guess where to. I immidiately snapped back and just finished the banana. I also have the same when opening an icognito window on my browser, I used to type in my favourite P sites. These are triggers which have me worried. How messed am I. Should I avoide eating bananas and browsing incognito all together? Also sometimes my toughts wander sometimes, for less than a second I think about (s)P than I snap back. Is is too late for me or will these random toughts go away.

    Stay strong guys.
     
    frazebam_isnberg likes this.
  6. for_change123

    for_change123 New Fapstronaut

    4
    12
    3
    From the information that I have read the triggers do diminish and will eventually disappear. It will take some time however, how long it takes is different for everyone.
     
  7. This is a post I was invited to give to a "significant other" on her man's attraction to this particular fetish of porn, it is posted from my old account. Some of this is a repeat but maybe it can help anyone on here as well:

    Hi @Hannah12269 and welcome to NoFap. You absolutely came to the right place. This community is FILLED with really wonderful caring people (and on rare occasions some nutcases and trolls, but ignore them). You are here, and there is a community here that really cares AND has been through what you and your boyfriend are challenged with. So far, from what I can read, you are getting wonderful advice from some of the BEST people on NoFap, way better than I will be able to give you. So, take a deep breath and know -- know absolutely --- that you can begin a path to understand some of this.

    To be upfront about this, I am a transgendered woman who, in her younger (teen) years thought that my exposure to this stuff influenced me in the directions and choices I took in life. Therapy has assisted me greatly to know that this is not the case, and that I am right where I belong in my lifestyle choices. But, as I spent time on NoFap, I came to realize that so many --- and I mean SO VERY MANY --- sweet straight nice guys are dealing with the issues you describe.

    I had until recently a bunch of sissy-fetish advice posts that I was occasionally posting, and yet last week took them down as I was on the verge of leaving NoFap after 14 months or so. I decided to hang around and now, @Kenzi in her wonderful engaging way has drawn me back into constructive posting.

    So, I will start by sharing a modified post from about a half-year ago I sent to a fellow who was deeply enmeshed and struggling with even the most basic questions of his own sissy-fetish and sissy-hypno attractions. He is a wonderful guy who just seems lost, but is struggling mightily with this issue and challenge.

    I hope this is, in some way, a narrative to maybe help you create a constructive conversation with the man you love, in hopes that trying first to understand his underlying issues with his own masculinity and his confidence in using and projecting his masculinity.

    Not all guys come into manhood with all the tools necessary to "be a man" in all his skills and glory; quite frankly, porn provides the wrong sets of messages and imagery and expectations for performance, endowment, and skills for a nice, regular, wonderful sweet guy hit with facefulls of online porn daily at ever-younger ages.


    Women discuss this peer-pressure and image-conciousness so much more than men, but men are subject to TONS of it, too, it is they just do not discuss it: look like Brad Pitt, swagger like the Rock, have the humor of Jimmy Kimmel, the wealth of Kanye, the suave-lifestyle of Richard Branson, but also be sensitive like Oprah and attentive like Michele Obama. How the hell can he be all that, AND have the physical prowess in bed to match or exceed the fake and phoney and genetic mutational porn-stars that crowd his screen every night?

    Guys today are under HUGE pressure to arrive into early adulthood fully baked as manly-men immediately, and that is unrealistic.

    So much press is out there (rightly so) in support of womens issues, but men just get lost and glossed over with masculine issues because men just don't share concerns very much. In that regard it is nice that your man trusts you so deeply as to share what he has shared --- 99% of guys wouldn't.

    I hope you don't mind me saying this: I hope his love for you and sincerity to understand and heal himself becomes as deep and convicted as yours --- if so, you guys can make it to the other side together.

    TRIGGER WARNINGS AFTER THIS ---- JUST GO AWAY OF TRIGGERED EASY BY THIS SUBJECT

    Anyway, what follows is a post, modified, from quite a while ago --- apologies and warnings for triggers but here it is in it's fullness uncompromised. I promise to add more specifics later but this should be a decent basis for attempting to have a constructive dialog, I hope.
    You are awesome for loving your man so deeply as to plunge into this subject yourself --- I love your warrior-woman courage and the love you have for him --- he is lucky!! You go, Khaleesi!!
    =========================================

    I see so many nice yet confused guys struggling mightily with this SISSY ADDICTION stuff, and I have tried to address SOME of the issues in a few posts and responses (which I had recently deleted) over time here on NoFap.

    Below is a COMPOSITE post I sent to a nice guy about a half-year ago. Maybe it has something in here for you to gain insights into your own behavior or someone you love.

    It is definitely NOT COMPREHENSIVE --- it was never meant to be. And APOLOGIES if I have offended anyone in any way --- this is just sharing my random thoughts and observations addressing specific commentary made by those I replied to-------> so, HERE IS THE POST------>



    Hi :)
    I read your post w interest, and it reminded me of advice I shared with a fellow of similar challenges that you state. So I thought i'd repost a bit of it here. It may not apply 100% to your current issue, but I hope there is something useful in here for you.

    First of all -----> YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!

    A few comments, random mostly, and not intending to offend or bother anyone ---- just observations mostly of guys and sissy fetish attractions:

    (1) Guys who get dragged into this fetish are almost always str8 or unsure, AND have low-self-esteem issues (often they are unaware of this) that is usually rising from early-years questions around their own masculinity and "manhood" stuff.

    (2) The self-wrestling match that arises in one's sexuality for low-self-esteem guys (and low masculine-confidence guys) is around the question "Am I gay?" or "Am I effeminate?" or "Am I a sissy?" . This lack of confidence and questioning can initiate an emotional vortex that can negatively reinforce ones masculinity while driving a guy to sissy-attraction and humiliation-arousals.

    Most guys on here in NoFap fighting this addiction are NOT gay and almost-definitely they are not Transgender, they are very much straight guys but not masculine-confident, and they get sucked into the vortex that sissy-curious blogs (Tumblr and Pinterest are full of them) and sissy-hypnosis videos (every P site is full of them) promote ---- it is a dangerous slippery-slope to lead a fellow from the necessary development of masculine confidence (which takes intimacy, trust, humor, time, practice, mistakes, and conquests, and love.....few of which are intact and functioning at early developmental stages) and instead leads them down a quick-exit pathway to an immediate dopamine-laden alternative-option that avoids normal masculine challenges and provides the sense of an alternative reality --- which is a wrong place for an unsure guy.

    (3) So, the dopamine-rush of curiosity-driven porn exploration provided by sissy-hypno and the sissy-lifestyle seemingly provides an "alternative" to curious yet unsure non-confident straight guys having to be a masculine man ---- effectively saying to them, in a seductive whisper, "Why compete with real virile masculine hunks? Instead, why not be a sissy?"

    It corrupts one as if there is an acceptable alternative (and assuming you are indeed a straight man, then there is no real alternative.

    I am M2F transgender woman --- seems odd that I would know so much about this sissy stuff even for me, but while I am and have always been attracted to guys, I am definitely NOT attracted to the sissy-lifestyles of submission, humiliation, verbal and physical abuse, and the overall emasculation of men. It is so wrong.

    (4) I think the "self-critical / self-hating" thing one observes in most sissy-porn addicts is a present-day manifestation from (almost always unrecognized, or forgotten, yet critical) earlier life-experiences and negative-imprinting by parents or significant others that induced and/or caused self-doubt around a guys masculinity and/or performance-ability, machismo, and confidence in his own male prowess at a critical time in his development as a man ---- the transition from boy to man isn't always a straight unconfused path.

    This aspect seemingly consciously manifests itself NOT as a current-day self-aware push-back on the issue of masculine confidence but rather as an in-the-moment curiosity to be considering (and over time an ever-deepening acceptance) of an alternative to straight male lifestyles ---- so, rather than being a man's man and all that entails (which is a LOT of effort and burden), well, maybe being a sissy is possible alternative option?

    (5) This is where the reinforcement of visual and aural repetition and voluminous porn-sources plays it's nasty trick on the less-than-confident straight guy considering a sissy-lifestyle as an option: the sissy-hypno's tend to use humiliation and demeaning language and rapid-fire imagery to suggest that "You are not a real man" and slowly (or quickly) degrade what little measure of masculine confidence (if any) a poor confused guy has remaining.

    The slick professional videos of skilled sissy hypnosis producers and purveyors drag the unsuspecting yet curious str8 guy into a hell they are absolutely not prepared for --- that a "sissy lifestyle" is a real option.

    For me, while I love my own choices, I find the humiliation and name-calling and abuse to be disgusting in those videos.

    (6) Sadly, so much of this "sissy stuff" is found on transsexual and "shemale" porn-sites, which unto themselves portray me and my own subgroup of sexual identity in a very horrific broad-brush portrait that we are all a certain way ---- as defined by "shemale porn" --- which is so very untrue...a very VERY minor percentage of transgender people are engaged in the adult industry.

    So many MANY transgendered people are balanced and functional contributors to society in all aspects of professional life (Need proof? Google up the following sane, balanced, wonderful transgendered women: Laverne Cox, Janet Mock, Carmen Carrera, Andreja Pejic, Geena Rocero, Isis King, Gisele Alicea, Jenna Talackova, Leyna Ramous, Dina Marie, Nina Poon, Juliana Huxtable, Niki M’nray, Pêche Di, Carmen Xtravaganza and Yasmine Petty.)

    I can not stress this enough: The association of what drives straight guys to sissy-fetishes is absolutely and overwhelmingly unrelated to what drives a truly transgendered person to transition --- but this is a whole different subject I will not delve into here.

    (7) Guys who have been successful in kicking this attraction to sissy-lifestyle and sissy-hypnosis go absolutely cold-turkey, do lots of guy-stuff (weights, fish, cars, hike, music, date girls, etc) again, and can indeed heal.

    Anyway, thats my 5 cents worth of input ---- it is probably wrong or inaccurate BUT it is what I observe a lot in this community.
    Good luck to you.


    Also, here is another post I made to the same person later in his thread --- again, I think it might assist for a guy's self-esteem challenges.

    I think I might just have a different perspective than most (not all) people --- as a transgender woman I see gender and sexuality as a continuum rather than a binary boy / girl thing. I think many of our generation are coming to see it that way.

    I also have listened to friends --- guys and girls--- and boyfriends and lovers (and searched my own soul and thoughts) about issues surrounding sexuality and questioning the standard binary-gender view of the world.

    The guys I have dated (and those attracted to me, and me to them) over the years are singularly and unquestionably straight heterosexual males. Full stop.

    I really understand guys, at least those kind of guys. They are at the far-end spectrum of classic male behaviors ---- view them as the hunky man's man, and in many ways are hyper-males ---- but true hyper-males, not out-there overdoing it guys trying to hide a deeper conflicted self ---- they are just pure testosterone, muscle, and instinct.


    I also have quite a few straight male friends that are and will remain as friends ---- and they are straight as can be and deeply curious around my choices, and ask a great deal about those choices.

    The guys that end up into the "friend zone" with me are there mostly because they do not have that hyper-masculine drive that I observe in many of my lovers. It is not to say that all my lovers are all "alpha males" (a term I dislike, btw), but the "friend-zone" friends have less determination to score or bed me, and more curiosity to observe me.

    They are more intellectual and less overtly animal. I am not hunted by them. It may be because they balk at my transgenderness, and yet are attracted to the femininity. They pause.

    I have never ever dated anyone with a sissy urge --- it hasn't been discussed and it is definitely not suspected by me. But I have run into a few guys --- friends --- that seem curious about my choices and lifestyle. I suspect a few that are dealing with this issue.

    For me, I process that kind of non-driven behavior in a straight guy --- probably erroneously --- as "less confident" and "less selfish" and "more caring and gentle". These are wonderful qualities, but it probably is why that, while I want to marry a "good guy", I am always attracted to the "bad boyz" all the time. It is probably (definitely?) the reason I am still single and searching ---- "bad boys" are almost always loutish knuckle-dragging Neanderthal-ish jerks that speak in mono-syllabic terms (apologies to any nice sweet Neanderthal guys out there;) ) and, while occasionally (but not always) great in bed, they lack all manner of other social graces and elegance for me.

    I wonder --- and I am probably wrong here --- but is it possible that some element of the "less confident" guy can, on occasion, be rooted in a early-development pattern that made them question not their sexuality but rather their masculine confidence and performance abilities.

    Yet, as time goes on, that lack of masculine confidence in the vast majority of guys (undermined subconsciously somewhere in the past) morphs into the overly-simple explanation that it is a sexual preference issue (I must be gay, or I must be a sissy, or I must be "not a real-man" or something) rather than it being what it truly is:

    The root is likely a man's lack of masculine confidence with women.
    It is NOT a "sissy thing" at all.....
    I think it is an important distinction here that is all-too-often confused as they get more active with women: lack of masculine confidence DOES NOT MEAN that a guy is less-than-a-man. Guys (and girls) don't have this all figured out from the start --- but the pressure to perform like a porn-star is huge on most guys.
    So, rather than "asking her out" or asserting (sweetly) an acceptable level of healthy-male pursuit of a woman to seduce, the fear of performance anxiety associated with lack of masculine confidence gets translated from...
    "I am scared to do this", into...
    ..."I can't do this!"...
    ....which gets further translated into...
    ..."I can't perform this so I am probably not true alpha-male"...
    ...which, after a few iterations, translates into...
    ..."Then I must be a sissy".

    Which is pure BS.

    So, my observations are that the fellows that run headlong (and get trapped) into this sissy fetish and sissy porn stuff are, as well, almost exclusively in the "good guy" category of truly straight guys.... BUT....

    ...there is a background echo inside them from early years that causes them to question their current masculine heterosexual capacity
    to some extent ---

    ----and that conscious and sub-concious echo of doubt, instilled by some one or some event(s) in the past ---

    ----- allows the questioning phase of being trapped in the "possibility sissy-vortex lifestyle" to keep falsely reinforcing the dopamine-laden ever-deepening curiosity of the sissification and feminization trajectory as a possible path to happiness
    -----

    ----which for some people may have some elements of attraction ...BUT for a "good guy, straight guy" there is no real path to happiness, no real option, as they are straight. Period.

    I don't know --- I am just rambling at this point --- BUT there is, I think, an overwhelming component of early-development self-doubt instilled (and subconsciously installed) in sweet wonderful straight guys that deal with this.

    I think the fundamental mix-up here is this:

    Make the internal distinction between one's lack of masculine confidence, and confusing that very normal trait and very real emotion with questioning one's sexuality.

    This boils down to distinguishing two things at the most elemental level. It is ones masculine confidence and one's developed and developing skills as a masculine man, versus one's own sexuality. They are two VERY different things.

    Confidence vs Sexuality.
    They are separate.
    Distinct.
    Different.
    Allow yourself the time to build-up and/or regain that masculine confidence ---- within yourself, and then with a woman you lust for and love.

    Lust is good. Love with lust is heaven. Take the time to get to that point --- it takes tenacity and determination and a soul-mate.

    So, everything I read in your post screams out at me that you are (1) lacking in confidence because of your self doubt, but also, I can tell by what you wrote, you are (2) definitely positively NOT transgender. You are just a little lost.

    Your recent loss of a girl you like --- the rejection almost definitely triggered those self-doubts around masculinity and capability --- it happens----and so you fell back into the proverbial rabbit hole.
    Just take a deep breath and stand back up. Girls leave guys. Guys leave girls. But it doesn't mean you're not a capable, masculine man.
    Go get a cheeseburger, fries, and a beer. Watch NFL w your buddies. Scratch your nuts. Don't shave for a week. Hit the gym. Channel your inner Bubba and feel that man arise.

    Like I said----you are a little lost.
    You can find yourself --and a new girl that makes you happy and frisky ---- and when you do you will find a more confident str8 guy. Truth.
    I wish you peace :)
    @Jamie_K_

    SO, as I said @Hannah12269 I hope there is a little something for you to take away and discuss with your man. This will take time and patience and love, but you have all that to give him. I agree, do NOT go down the rabbit hole with him, but do try to understand the attraction and curiousity he feels that draws him there. It is only when you find a common root-cause you can BOTH address, BUT he MUST be willing to challenge and kill that DRAGON alone with courage and conviction --- after that you can both begin a journey to a healthy, loving, sensual relationship that will last a lifetime with the both of your commitment.
    Lastly, he MUST for himself at some point soon be willing and wanting to exit this lifestyle choice --- not for you but for himself----and that is only for you to judge when --- or else you must save yourself and exit. I know that is not in your thinking right now, you have made that clear, but at some point you must realize that some people do not want to be saved from their own poor choices, but ....and I know you do not want to hear this, but....you shouldn't obligate yourself to sacrifice your all to enable his hell. It is not fair to either of you. At that point go read Mary Oliver's poem "The Journey" --- a most powerful call to march out into the future with courage. I hope you both go there together, as that is your wish.
    Everything I read in prior posts from @Kenzi @GhostWriter @Jagliana and @GG2002 is spot-on.
    He is lucky.
    You are awesome.
    I wish you the best. If I can assist further please reach out. Have a great weekend!!

    Anyway. I think that is the extent of my prior postings that might help here ---- anyone that wants to chat about this and more, just connect.

    @Maninsearchofasoul I miss you --- hope your summer is going well and you are recovering nicely
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 7, 2018
  8. live life trying

    live life trying Fapstronaut

    14
    66
    13
     
  9. live life trying

    live life trying Fapstronaut

    14
    66
    13
    Thanks 4 this post. I read your analysation with a lot of curiosity and an 'open jaw'.
    I can only speak in my own name, and I think you're absolutely right.
    As I drifted in PMO as the years went on, this addiction ended in Sissy Fetish.
    It was the time when i quit drugs (2 months ago), read along article on Porn addiction and what it does to your brain, and that I might be wrong.
    There's nothing wrong with being vulnerable as a guy or do 'unmanly' things(or considered to be):reading, arts, talking about feelings),
    and being a bit macho (or considered to be): drinking beer, doing sports, burping not wearing 'slippers' in the house).

    I think It's also a cultural thing: The porn Industry shaped a very visual culture (arts, tv, fb, instagram, the need 2 be seen, showing only the 'happy side of the life') in which we live today in a VERY negative way.

    You're offering a lot of handles for many in the same position as I am.
    I want to thank you sincerely for that.

    ps: scuse my fringlish, English is not my native language
     
  10. Thank you @live life trying for reaching out and saying that --- I wonder sometimes if I am wasting mine or others time posting on NoFap, but I appreciate you saying you found my post helpful.
    In my years on NoFap thee seems to be a few common themes for nice str8 guys w this fetish --- and the confusion that arises between being "less than confident" as a male gets exploited and amplified with this genre of P.
    Agree, fully.
    Succinct and very truthful statement. P industry takes the familiar and twists and intertwines it with "new, erotic, and enticing" and creates a "new normal" for guys in a very weakened (or non-existent) state of masculine confidence.

    I wish you peace and healing as you deal with this challenge. It is very possible to overcome.
     
  11. Omg this is me I think. Who are you? How do I connect?
     
  12. a pink elephant

    a pink elephant Fapstronaut

    50
    70
    18
    This is a truly great thread.

    It gave me so much insight into sP and why we are attracted to this lifestyle. Wish someone can talk to me and help me recover as I just joined this NoFap site.
     

Share This Page