To bdsm or not to bdsm

Option 1: So where I am near Seattle, you would probably not even have to pay. You could (in theory,) go on the internet, find out when a munch will occur, talk to some people, ingratiate yourself with them, attend live events, lower your standards (sharply) and engage in consentual play.

Option 2: Pay a professional, the worse possible option in my opinion. Also speciality services will cost a premium, around here think $400 an hour in a professional dungeon with strict safety protocols.

 

Don't do this. To experience it in IRL is absolutely different. Some guys have done this and they said they felt absolutely different and didn't get even aroused. They experienced incredible big feelings of the shame. Admit that you like it but let it go. You are slaving to your dopamine craving not experiencing servitude or sth, it is totally fake and dumb. I offer to get rid of this thought because it can lead you to even darker places.

 

There is always

Option 3: Accept and trancend your urges through prayer and meditation. Try to find the root cause of your problems, and transend the root cause.

For instance the root cause of me wanting to dominate women is that I am extremely shy around women, and generally a rescuer/pleaser, so the polar opposite would be hyperconfident and sexually dominant. So I daily make a conscious effort to be more confident and assertive, and the urges gradually fade.

 

If these thoughts occupying the way you think sex should be, you really should test it out and see what it feels like for you. From my experience I can retell a different story. The thought of inflicting somebody else pain to elevate pleasure is ad absurdum and still it can be exciting and enticing for many women and men. Never should you harbor an evil will against the person you commit having sex with at this level.

 

Just remember that there is always someone more messed up than you, so you will, if you attend an event witness some stuff you don't want to witness. Homosexuality/bisexuality and transexuality are basically required to be accepted here (it's Seattle,) so you will be required to witness it in action. My BDSM desires are borderline vanilla, and I would be required to witness extreme acts that might turn my, and your stomach.

 

Prayer for an Athiest can be more along the lines of self talk. Engage in self talk, improve your self talk. If your self talk is negative, make it positive. There doesn't have to be any spirituality/religion involved. Making an inventory of your positive qualities and repeating them to yourself rather then being stuck in a negativity loop can be lifechanging.

 

I'm also very sadistic. It's the only thing that turns me on.
I dont rememember i ever was interested in sth else. Even as a child i had these tendencies

 

Does that mean that if youre more confident and assertive, youre more interessted in normal sex?

 

More I fill the role that I am fantasizing about in a nonsexual way. I AM the hyperconfident man, and don't need some sex act to prove it. Right now, I have no sadistic desires, and feel so great from semen retention, that my desire for partnered sex is much lower then pushing through my streak.

 

As long as you have got it after Porn use then it is absolutely unnatural and as you reboot your brain will rewire to its natural desires away from BDSM. I highly recommend you to to stop thinking about feeding your fetishes and mainly BDSM because it is limitless and will keep making you desires worse to the worst no matter how much you convince yourself that "i am fine with this not that"

 

As in you want to be dominated? If so I can help get rid of it. Please PM me.