Hello, Community! It feels good in a weird way to finally write here and post it. I came across NoFap doing some research online about my addiction. At that point, I had foolishly only seen the “controversy” about if this kind of behavior constitutes a neurochemical addiction. I guess I was unconsciously fooling myself too, relying on the issue being a scientific “controversy”, when in fact I knew deep inside all along that it absolutely made sense that this is a full-on neurochemical addiction. In my case, an intense addiction, going for around 15 years. I’m 27 (which is unfathomable to me, considering how much I’ve missed out on) and I’ve been addicted since when I was around 12. For me it started accidentally, being exposed to porn on satellite TV, when my family were a bit careless about these things. That was enough for my young, absorbent brain. The material found its way into my brain easily over the years, as I escalated from looking at images, to sneaking in to the living room late at night to check out the material on late night TV, to looking at images online, and finally to high-speed online porn. It's been a deep emotional connection. Last December, doing research, I came across the famous interview with Dr. Carnes. That was the turning point for me. I felt so devastated. Sobbing in disbelief. It all made sense. It all fell into place. Scientifically and psychologically. I knew then that I had lived basically like a cocaine addict for years. I had to face the shadow in me. Soon after I started my abstinence. I came clean about it all to my girlfriend, who’s shown enormous amounts of understanding and support, but that could only help so much. The withdrawal has been physically excruciating for me. I guess due to the severity of my addiction. I won’t go to the details here, but I’ve been and still am extremely worried about what the addiction might have done to my brain and body, physically. I am still dealing with severe symptoms, and I’m definitely in need of counsel, and past experiences, having to do with the medical aspect. When I first started, I went on for three weeks of no PMO with extremely severe symptoms, then relapsed for 5 times in two days, then started again and now I’ve just completed five weeks. It’s only a start, and I’m going to need a lot of strength going forward. I hope I can gain some strength and guidance here in the community, and help as much as I might be able to.