Finding the darkest places in my soul... HELP!!

Hey dude, I´ve been through the same problem. What you have to do now is start over and look forward, think about it this way: paying a girl online is unmanly and that it demasculates you, makes you weak. If you keep thinking like this it will be easier to avoid it. The other day I wasted about 100 euro in one sitting and afterwards I felt like garbage. Use this feeling to learn, stand up and grow stronger.

 

Block every site you can remember that you visited, that is what i did yesterday. Good luck!

 

If you have that kind of money easily spent without second thought, try making it more difficult to make spur of the moment choices like that. Open a savings account at another bank and put money in it that you dont want easy access to. Do not opt for an atm card for the account so that youmust first go to the bank to get money out.

Or have a cash savings you ask skmebody you trust to store for you, thus you have to go through them first to make any large purchases. Basically, create extra steps for yourself to go through before you can spend any significant sums of money.

 

I've got myself into debt over webcam addiction and phone sex addiction. And now I am recovered - 2 years since I spent any money on any of these services, although I have several times checked the old sites out of 'curiosity', I have not, thank goodness, spent any more money.

I agree with making it harder for yourself, so that you don't end up spending money 'automatically'. If your credit card details are in your computer, delete them so that you have to enter them automatically. If you haven't memorised your card details - great news, put your credit cards somewhere in a different room from your computer/devices, in a drawer or even somewhere locked away - give yourself enough time to notice what you are doing and take back control!

Ultimately though, the decision has to be yours - no more spending money on this nonsense! Whatever it takes!

 

Yo dude, I'm sure you're feeling all sorts of emotions at the moment: anger, sadness, disappointment, regret, etc. The good news is that if you consider this moment a rock bottom, you'll have no where to go but up. Like tryinghard2quit said, there is no point in beating yourself up. This lowers your self esteem and it can make you more vulnerable to future relapse. What you have to realize is that, you can't beat this addiction with one shot. You measure your success by the small goals and progress that you are able to meet. When you meet those goals and you continue to make progress, that's what sets you up for longer and longer streaks. Bottom line, you have to build your self esteem and feel good about yourself in order to have a fighting chance against porn addiction. Being vulnerable emotionally sets us up for going down a dark hole that we may not easily get out of.

Another thing to note is managing your stress level. If you have a demanding job and you work long hours, you're going to be tired: mentally, emotionally, and physically. This makes you vulnerable to relapse. You have to be able to schedule in time for self care and mindfulness. If you're job is too demanding, you might want to consider finding something that pays you less money but you work less hours in order to have better work life balance.

 

never forget that you're not alone in this. . give yourself some credit, you're on here! that is a huge step in the right direction. It's a working progress