Temptation

I've not even made it to my original "best" reboot period and the temptations are killing me. I was a lifetime prone-masturbator and frequently had issues with anorgasmia during intercourse, even as a younger man. I'm not sure why prone but it just started that way and I stuck with it.

I made it through yesterday though. I was on a 9 1/2 hour drive back from Christmas with my extended family. Traffic stresses me out. Stress makes me want to jerk off.

While the anorgasmia from TMS is not the only issue at hand with my reboot, it is a significant one for me.

I haven't set any specific goals or lengths of time to do this. I've been celibate for a couple of years now. I think I like myself better, and have fewer body image issues, when I'm not looking at idealized images. As much as I hate the dating process, I'd rather not have an orgasm outside of intercourse. I hate to be so base but I think my ultimate "reboot" would just be to get laid and for it to be a normal, fun experience again. I think I need to reboot a little longer before going there.

Sorry to ramble. I just have to put my thoughts out somewhere and this is the only place where I talk about any of this.