Day 0 of 30 Pmo Free Rough go, but I'm noticing alot of hidden triggers. Going forward i can now better control them. Good luck everyone
Why do you think this? Many people have proved the opposite. Addictions take a long time to cure, not just 3 weeks. I think it's natural to go through some confusing emotions while withdrawing. It's all part of the process. Including feeling negative about it. Do you think you can find ways to think more positively about it? Like, focus on the pride you get from abstaining for example, rather than on the difficulties. And if you do happen to slip, as long as you don't get into a binge, in my experience you don't lose all progress. You don't go back to square one.
There's no cure. The only way I can blunt the emptiness is through PMO. It was never a challenge to reach 30, 90, 100 days, and every streak went above 70-90 days. That's not the case anymore. It is just what it is. The best I can do is 20 days, post that i go through unexplainable emptiness, where my gut revolts against my work. Can't help it man. Let it be. All the best to you.
First things first, I am so proud of you for holding yourself together even in such a difficult situation. Many just give up. So that's some great courage you have shown -- yes, it takes a lot of courage. I was in a relationship too, and it took away everything from me -- literally EVERYTHING and I was gonna kill myself. But here I am still alive a cpl years later, still building myself block by block. I am not complete yet, not the person I used to be. But, I am building myself up slowly. I have come so far -- my suicidal self would have never imagined that possibility. But I am here. That gives me faith, that if you keep going day by day, after a period of time you will see yourself at a place where you never imagined you could be, doing things you never imagined you could do (big or small -- it all means a lot). Now and then, I do think of how I am still not who I was and how I'm still struggling and how far I have to push myself, and it gets really upsetting. But then I remind myself that I was so broken and dead, it was beyond impossible for me to even imagine being a functioning human being, but here I am and I'm still fighting. I then feel motivated, and regain faith to move forward. This journey won't end -- the journey of finding yourself, making yourself better everyday. Maybe the terrible things that happened are opportunities for us to learn some deep lessons. I understand all the emptiness and inadequate feeling -- I feel it too and it crushes me. But you have been there before, and you had a brighter day after that period. It is possible again. You just need to push, just like you did. Just have faith in yourself and your effort. I am sure you will be even better than your past beautiful person, someday. Please don't give up. You can make it!!
You say you can't be cured. But I don't belief that. I think you can be cured, like many others have been. You aren't different from all others in this. Have you already tried everything you can think off?
@Jiminy Cricket @bettermeeveryday Thanks guys! I hope I recover. Yes, there's nothing I can do right now. I can push with sheer will, but post 18-20 days I'm challenged by my own gut and intuition. The only chance I may have is recovery through time, but I don't know how long it may take. @bettermeeveryday Interesting account! Maybe I should let my feelings lead this recovery over trying to "solve" it logically. Thanks both of you!