So I'm 30 days deep into no PMO (despite my badge saying just PM), and my SO is getting fairly restless. I wanted to ask you all if giving oral sex counts as a relapse. My intention of rebooting is to break the habit of porn and actual make the effort for real sex again, but I'm not sure if this looks like a cop-out. Looking forward to hearing your thoughts!
I have to say, I think I'm one of the least knowledgable people on this board on the whole rebooting process. But I think this would be a good thing to do. You want to overcome your addiction to enjoy real sex again. And this whole rebooting thing is quite tough on your SO. I think it would be a good gesture.
Part of reboot is rewiring. Means you don't just starve out the PMO-neurons, you should make new connections at the same time. Connecting sex with a real partner is a great thing. Do the things you want to do for the rest of your life, stop the ones you don't, is a good rule of thumb.
I’m of the mind that the rebooted shouldn’t be using his/her sexy part for pleasure. For guys that means your magic wand does not go in a mouth, a vag or a dirty posey. For women no stroking or stuff in the love lotus. Intimate touching and all that is good. I think it’s good to try to avoid O as much as possible. If your lover is not Rebooting though, give them the Big O. It’s healthy fun and builds intimacy.
Wow, it so simple and wise. Thats exactly what i try to do, but I never stated it as clear as you did. Its totally zen as fuck
I second what Foxhole said. A clear succinct and straightforward approach to what can be a confusing and angst-ridden process! Thank you for your wise words, ZenAF!