everytime i relapsed i regreted it and now i have fetishes which i am disgusted by. i always justified my addiction with one more relapse. spoiler its never just one more. this addiction is turning me in to something i refuse to become. so as of now i am 2 hours in to my journey. my fetishes such as femdom, hentai made me hate my self and everytime i want to quit i come back to it of my own free will. i know hating my self will not help and i need to forgive my self but it is hard. i am doing nofap not for anyone but for my self because i know this is what i want. i want to remove my fetishes as well as porn and fapping from my life. for too long i allowed this shit to consume me with a cycle of relapse feeling bad and relapsing more but not anymore. and people who started this journey today i hope we can support each other to beat this addiction. what i will do is cold showers, video games , eat 3 times a day and exercise. (sorry for bad english)
