Hi, its me again. Since last post I have relapsed twice, but without slapping the salami so hard that i got 3/4 orgasms in sth like 20 minutes. The previous one was like normal, I got bored and thats why i lost another battle. But 2day, I relapsed cuz I got hugged by 2 very cute girls, then I went back home with a smile on my face, and PMO. I literally stop thinking. That shows me how much of a loser I am xd. Thats ridiculous, I have no idea if I should laugh or cry... but here I am, starting my journey again...
I guess since you have had a history of PMO like many of us you are at the stage when any sort of intimacy or closeness with real life girls triggers your mind to think of PMO. Next time something intimate like this happens, go home, and just spend 5 - 10 minutes in a quiet space and just celebrate that real life sensation of having an intimate space with a girl - block out PMO and if PMO thoughts arise just focus on breathing - but basically try to learn to savour the real life experiences for wha rhey are instead of letting it be transformed into something which it should not be - a trigger for PMO. I wish you all the best!
James is right, don't be too hard on yourself. Winning this battle will be one of the toughest tasks of our lives. It's an addiction and like recovering alcoholics or gamblers it will be a lifelong fight. Don't dwell on the reasons for a reboot/relapse, just focus on how good you were feeling before the slip and try to replicate that. Good luck