Can I talk to someone before I kill myself...

As someone who's been through the same, and has successfully recovered, yes I can.

 

Talk to me brother. I relapsed severely today ( 3 times ) and would also like someone to talk to.

 

I did everything minus the cold shower and still relapsed. Man, I always fail at the four day mark nowadays. i really really really want to reach 14 again. I want this voice in my head to stop justifying watching porn. I want to stop getting overpowered by urges. I want to be able to do what I did in January. I said " it stops here" and went 29 days clean. I just can't seem to do it anymore. I always pray to the LORD but I keep failing regardless. I keep letting him down

 

no kik, used to have whatsapp

 

Yeah I don't mind using the conversation inbox thing either.

 

I know how you're feeling man, sometimes that voice screams louder than my actual thoughts.... Holding out hope and standing your ground is the best you can do sometimes, kick and scream back, spite the hell out of that voice

 

Do you workout, meditate, run/cardio, talk a walk in your park, take cold showers, hang out with friends (this one is optional btw), pray, go to church (this one too), talk about this problem with your best friend or any family member who you think can understand?

Nofap becomes easier when you get better at things I mentioned above. Nofap is more like a result of the new positive habits you develop over time. This is much easier said than done but those who are willing to give 100% will succeed no matter how difficult it may seem.

 

talk to me bro please. i can realteyou are not alone trust me bro

 

... highs and lows are the rule on our journey. It's very difficult sometimes, but it's just the way it works. you cannot think about suicide only because you relapsed: you just needed a relapse, because you are human. Of course, you feel very bad (shameful and defeated) after it happend, as as well you felt bad before, because your very veins and brain were so full of hormones and ... you couldn't help, you had do it. It's just the way an addition works, and no one will be ever able to break it in one day. Don't feel ashamed ore defeated, nor think of suicide: it's pointless. even though you masturbated ten times in a row, consider that tomorrow you will masturbate "only" nine times, and the day after only eight and so on. It's difficult to recover from a long bad habit, it takes a lot of time, self-discipline and plenty of patience towards yourself. So, go on and good luck ...

 

@K10, only just saw this post. Looks like things are a little better now, I'm glad to see.

Keep this link handy, OK? And keep in touch with the community.
You got this.