Going through feeling shitty -> fapping -> feeling even more shittier cycle

3rd day is a day for mixed feeling for me.
Sorted out the fight that I had with my girl. That thing is still under progress.
Physical change: I am getting frequent boners and urges are more stronger and hard to resist.
Fighting back takes a lot of energy.

What I am thinking of doing tomorrow, Joining the old basketball club I left due to some reasons, Making a schedule and trying to stick to it. Fight back procrastination too.

The counter helps a lot. And even small replies from you guys give me positive feeling that I am not in this fight alone

 

Just back here to check my counter and reply to some new posts.
This things keep you going.

 

Another day ends for me.
Ok so some positivity going on. The goals I set yesterday, I was able to complete them today. I went to my old basketball club. But that place is shit now so I am not continuing, tomorrow I have my exam so I think I will be busy the whole day. Nothing to plan for tomorrow. Everything is going smooth with my girl. We sorted out some issues.

Planning on buying a new set of headphones, Music is a need for me, so these are the tools I have to have.

Gotta do some studying to do, finals are coming.

That thing I said about beating procrastination, uhmm That will take a while.

Ciao.
Day 4 ends. Happy to see the counter ticking.

 

goddamnit..
Just had an urge..Was browsing youtube and the browser suggested some slutty video I clicked the link and that fricking thing started playing.
Had to snap the band 4-5 times. To get away from that.
I came straight here.
And I am writing..to clear my mind.
Dont pay attention to this post. Just my fingers on keyboard to get away.
Think about music.
uhmm
ed sheeran
metallica
corn
limp bizkit
umm
j cole
eminem
drake
umm

Imma take a walk I guess..

 

Ok..Day 5 ends.
Just here to talk about it.

Today was a busy day so like there was no problem in fighting against PMO.
As I said I am getting frequent boners and the urges are stronger now.
Someone said it would be tough around the day 6 and I think I know what he was talking about.
The depression is still here.
Trying to find something to get out of this feeling, Now I am starting to think that the depression wont go away even if I stay fap free even for years. It is an another monster in itself. I have to cope with it in another way.
Thinking of starting to watch a new sitcom series or something just to get my mind away from some stuff thats it.

Thank you people for your support.
Your small replies to me helps me a lot.
Dont leave me alone in this fight.
I am feeling very clingy and all that.

Sorry for sounding like a pussy/wuss.

 

HAHA Davecb,
A new programming language is all I need now.
I am thinking of taking on the J2EE framework, struts hibertnate, spring..You know the stuff.

Aaaaaand I hate chocolate.

 

Hey drew,
dont feel bad about loosing a few battles.
This is a war, and it wont matter in the end how many battles who won.
We are all here with you. Helping you in this fight.
Its natural of your body trying to go back in your comfort zone. Its your animal instinct of going back to what you liked doing.
But you have a conscience too, which tells us the difference between right and wrong. And you know this is wrong thats why you decided to fight against it, right.
A new day is here. Start afresh. We are with you.

 

Aziz,
I totally get what you are talking about. Its actually very important to know how addiction works. And I am here fully prepared with all the knowledge against this.
I visited yourbrainonporn various times and it actually helps.
Thanks for your support.
Good luck to you too.

 

I never imagined going 6 days straight PMO free.
Well today was a busy day, had college in the morning, I slept all noon till evening. A little guitar practice in the evening and everything us going smooth till now. Well, this will be my schedule for this month. I hope that i dont slip up in between.
All in now.

Thanks guys for your support.

 

My relationship is turning into shit. There is too much pressure on me right now, with literally no help from whomsoever, my family, my friends, my girlfriend, feels like everyone just changed overnight and left me alone.
I dont know what to do.

 

Just here to check my counter