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Confused 31 y/o

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by ManInMacc, Feb 26, 2020.

  1. Feb 26, 2020 #1
    ManInMacc

    ManInMacc Fapstronaut

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    I’ve been prolifically MB for 15+ years, going through phases of anywhere between 1-5 times a day. It’s become a habit, a routine. When I’m bored, sad, frustrated, procrastinating. I actually look forward to it when I’m out of the house, and plan what I’m going to do when I get home. I’ve had phases where I’ve cut down but never stopped, or attempted to stop. I admit I’ve wasted a lot of time MB.
    I got into a new relationship about three years ago and my partner is very attractive and has a very high sex drive, as do I. But after a few months of regular, passionate sexual contact I found myself more interested in MB than having sex. It’s now weeks, sometimes months between our sexual contact, but all the while I’m MB secretly up to five times a day. Sometimes covertly whilst lay in the same bed, which is terrible.
    I know this isn’t normal. I know that it’s having a detrimental effect on our relationship. Not just impacting my interest in physically having sex, but also the feeling of rejection my parter is having.
    I know I need to stop, but I don’t know where to start. I’ve tried before and the most I’ve lasted is about a week. And when I failed, it was more because of the habit I felt I was breaking than the desperate need to MB or orgasm. I’m essentially trying to break a habit I have followed for over half my life. Where do I begin?
     
    ManInMacc, Feb 26, 2020
    ManInMacc, Feb 26, 2020
    #1
  2. Feb 26, 2020 #2
    Jnuts

    Jnuts Fapstronaut

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    If I were you I would start by being honest with her. It is going to hurt her, but it sounds like she is already being hurt. I don't think you are going to be able to make much of a dent in your habit otherwise.

    Curious. Do you use pornography?
     
    Jnuts, Feb 26, 2020
    Jnuts, Feb 26, 2020
    #2
    Deleted Account and Coffee Candy like this.
  3. Feb 26, 2020 #3
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Heyyy welcome to the NoFap forum : ) It's nice to see you here fighting the good fight alongside us!


    First let me go ahead and drop some helpful links for you:

    Getting Started Guide / Forum Rules / How to Use the NoFap forums/ Glossary/ NoFap Panic button/ Set up your day counter / Rebooting Resources/ About NoFap/ Support NoFap


    Here is just some advice:


    First and foremost please take a look at each section in the forum, there might be something(s) you may find of big help to you. Feel free to post there :+)


    Then secondly I just advise you to be active on your profile(as there a few active people in the profile section). Please start by choosing an avatar and then make daily status posts to show you're active and needing support/encouragement. They've also got a neat little feature that shows freshly posted statuses for all users to see. People will find your profile and give you encouragement/support.


    Theres a portion of people who love communicating in the profile section..(it should be and is )mostly spportive talk but it doesn't hurt to deviate from supportive talk. It would be great to have you join in and support others in the threads, profiles, and journal. Make sure and be grateful for the help you received and give some help after receiving some. Invest in some people's journeys. We could always use your help and in return you shall receive some as well!


    Thirdly, You should also highly consider creating a public journal/log (in the appropriate section for you) and write about your days in more depth for us members to follow along your journey and offer support to you by way of posting in your journal.


    Last but not least: Good luck on your journey here, make sure to really give it a try with all your heart!
     
    Deleted Account, Feb 26, 2020
    Deleted Account, Feb 26, 2020
    #3
  4. Feb 27, 2020 #4
    ManInMacc

    ManInMacc Fapstronaut

    18
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    Yes I do, every time I MB. I actually struggle to find new pornography because I’ve seen so much of it.
    I also find that when we do have sex I have to think about pornography in order to orgasm.
     
    ManInMacc, Feb 27, 2020
    ManInMacc, Feb 27, 2020
    #4
  5. Feb 27, 2020 #5
    Jnuts

    Jnuts Fapstronaut

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    Gotcha. I am in the same boat except my use is not as frequent. I really do think confessing it to your partner is the way to go. Once ai told my wife I had a problem it was much easier to get the motivation to do something about it.
     
    Jnuts, Feb 27, 2020
    Jnuts, Feb 27, 2020
    #5

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