Abstinence for the next 50 years?

Speaking for myself, no this is not okay. If I relapse every couple of weeks then I'm still addicted. I want to be free.

 

i dont know whos that but we are not doing semen retention, we are fighting porn, if you dont understand this addiction well, people can watch porn without masturbation, so why stop all, because of abused of porn and masturbation and orgasm, we have created a pathway in the brain where all 3 are linked together, if you orgasm it will release dopamine surges in those pathways creating a chaser effect for you to go back to pmo. And for your infos if you refrain yourself from visual\vocal triggers after you get cured you will not gave a sexual urge to have sex, but you will still have a need to start a family which purely biological, people have + 400/ 2 years 4 years of pmo some refrained from sex too, its not impossible, it i think you are co fused the urge with p or to masturbate with the libido which is also screwed because deltafosB neurons have link arousel to pmo, even libido can be controlled. This is by i creasing willpower, which is in the prefrontal cortex when the grey matter is exercised it grow like any muscle or grows less when not exercises, exercise it enough you will go against biological need to even food and water for long days.

 

You don't need to be a monk or Buddhist to have success, but it certainly helps to have dedicated your life to something.. that isn't porn.

 

It depends on what kind of man you want to be as well as your moral compass.

I want to be the kind of man who never looks at pornography for the rest of his life, never masturbates, and has satisfying sexual intimacy with his wife.

And I have no doubts about that.

Each of us must investigate our convictions and pursue the ideal we orienting ourselves toward. If your goal is just to manage your addiction, you are planning to fail. That said, it can be helpful not to think about "the rest of my life" which seems daunting, and instead just think about "this month, this week, today . . . I will not PM"

 

Yeah, The Dalai Lama Challenge is not for me.

 

Certainly not me. I believe all of us addicted can't use porn slightly.

Otherwise, we are going to relapse hard. It has to be completely eliminated of our lives.

 

So you might also want to keep in mind monks keep a whole lot of precepts other than the one that involves celibacy, even just the 5 that lay Buddhists practice have things like don't steal, not using (other) intoxicants and not lying. Those few right there are involved in just about any addiction probably. With lying and falsehood it tends to show up more readily with people in relationships for obvious reasons, we hear people who also have substance addictions, but I don't even think it needs to involve a drug - look at any attention based media addiction. Which by the way is a form of stealing, actually if anything we have our attention stolen from us by these attention economy machine platforms, but also if someone is trolling or something it's basically about stealing the attention of other users on a platform.

Anyway point is it's not JUST about not acting out sexually, to whatever extent, but the principles underlying those other ones is relevant to all kinds of addictive behavior. In general with all the rules they have a structure for discipline, but it's not just a bunch of stuff they can't/don't do, it can help you have a focused life aside from the sexual aspect.

 

Well, I think what we are trying to achieve with NoFap is to give ourselves a chance to get off porn, which has highjacked the pleasure-seeking and decision-making centers of the brain.

The 90 days is just a generic period of time that it would take for most people to re-wire. It could be shorter or longer, depending on your physiology and level of dependency on porn use. You would know you are re-wired because you would no longer be seeking out porn or feel like the world is going to end if you don't masturbate. The fact is that you don't have to do either of those things for the rest of your life and you will be fine.

Having sex is a natural instinct and obviously necessary for procreation, but as rational creatures, we can choose to act upon that instinct or not. Right now, you and I don't have a choice because of the dependency on porn which perverts the sex drive and obscures our ability to reason. You could say that the bigger picture is that we are able to consciously choose when and if we want to have sex, rather than that choice being made for us by the manipulation of our passions.

I doubt that the Dalai Lama thinks of his lifelong chastity as an achievement in the way you and I do. If he did, he would probably give into his passions in a heartbeat. My guess is that through meditation he is able to enter into blissful states that dwarf momentary sensual pleasure, so sexual stimulation isn't of any particular interest to him.

 

It reminds me of star wars when Luke s x wing San into the swamp he interstate days we'll never get it out now and Yoda immediately said "so certain are you?". The whole conversation they had is relevant to this, ending with luke saying "I don't believe it" and Yoda replying "that is why you fail."