Hi, I've posted in the main hub a couple of times, but just wanted to pop in and make myself known here. I'm a Christian man in his late 20's who's not gone longer than 1.5 months without PMO for as long as I can remember, and not gone longer than 2 weeks for several months (averaging a PMO every few days). Sex is on my mind most of the time (though I do try not to let that be the case), and my descent into P has only gotten more and more depraved. I've joined the forum because I feel like I can only be truly honest anonymously, and I'm just at a loss. The worst part is I've basically stopped caring. I'm kinda mid-struggle with a few things relating to the faith atm, so that doesn't help, but I'm also just getting to a point where I'm tired of the guilt and so I've stopped feeling guilty. There's a tiny flicker in me that's pushed me to join the forum, but I don't feel like I have much fight in me. I know I'm hurting myself, but that doesn't seem to demotivate me from doing so. I don't care when I'm tempted, and then I do afterwards, and then I don't care again, and each time I care less. Hoping to find support here among some brothers. I feel kinda bad in a way, because I have an excellent church with a great support structure, but even though I'm accountable to someone I don't feel like I'm getting anywhere with it. I just feel too ashamed to admit to them all the details, and so that prevents them from being able to help me fully. I confess minimally, and I make the same mistakes, and while I made strides at the start, now I just feel like I'm stuck with one foot in and one foot out. It's circles. And hey, even now among strangers, I'm shying from details. I'm scared to go into it. I think about what I've looked at and thought about and considered and sometimes it scares me. I can barely admit to myself what I've done.
welcome. (redemolished) what helped me tremendously when i started nofap 30 days ago was confession, i shared in this forum my issues with PMO (early exposure, by whom, struggles, failures, its affect on my life and relationship with God etc) I felt too shame to share with anyone. that darkness stuck with me for many years and kept me a helpless slave to (PMO). I was stuck in a habit loop that i could not get out of on my own. Porn (P) masturbation (m) orgasm (O) and the sorry, repentance, forgiveness, and a series of negative emotions that follows, then the cycle starts over and over again. It's a demonic stronghold that has to be broken by the power of God. For me God has lead me to a wealth of knowledge here in and outside of this forum that has shed much light on PMO addiction. (Hosea 4:6 My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge..) i have been reading quite a bit of helpful information e.g Your Brain on Porn by Gary Wilson i encourage you to read it up. this journey is a re-learning process so as (Toni7) said Stay strong brother. We are in this together!
If you still feel guilt, don't ignore it! Conviction doesn't feel the best but the fact that you're still convicted means that through the Holy Spirit you can fight! We all need to come to a point where we face the truth; what we've done is wrong, we are all sinful, and we need God's forgiveness and help to overcome! I agree with what David and Toni said, but may I add something? The painful part about this sin is that for it to lose its power, we have to bring it out into the light. It is really hard to confess, but it is necessary to find people at church who you can truly confess to. And hey, if you are in Christ, you're no longer a slave to PMO. Yes, we struggle but in Him, we can put it to death! If you don't believe that God can and will give you the strength to overcome, you can't. Sorry for the long paragraph! Be sure to check the information tab for some resources that might help you out Praying for you and God Bless!
Welcome. This is the fight of our lives, and it will take everything we've got -- and then some! -- in order to get free. before you can start on that journey, though, you have to decide you want to take it in the first place. If you decide that freedom is worth paying any price and commit to not go back no matter what, then there is much in store for you. I am praying for you and cheering you on toward a new kind of life in Christ. Please feel welcome to reach out here any time.
Do not be ashamed to talk about it. Continue to confess and bring this into the light. Do not let your heart be hardened. God can renew your heart and mind. There are great benefits to quitting that you have yet to experience brother.
Thanks all. I've not quit, though I doubt the tempation is gone forever. I've started journaling here if anyone wants to keep up with where I'm at: https://forum.nofap.com/index.php?posts/2650637/
