Don’t see flatline as a negative man, realise that it’s your brain/mind rewiring and adjusting to life without this horrendous addiction. You’ve got to go through this tough period to heal and believe me it is worth it, you’ll start to be at peace with yourself and you’ll start to take care of yourself more doing things that you know are good for you and will make you happy. Trust the process bro, stay strong, you’re already 5 weeks into it so why would you wanna throw all that progress away? It’s not worth it, do you still wanna be plagued by this addiction when you are married and have kids? Think of your why and keep that close to you all the time.
Day 202: Straight to the point; I’ve just nearly relapsed. Thankfully I stopped myself because if I would have relapsed it would have really fucked me up. I literally typed in a P website but my content blocker stopped it. I am so shook right now, fuck sake, I was so so close. All the progress that I have made flashed before my eyes and I think that’s what stopped me. I’m so glad I didn’t do it, damn. I’m really shook up right now my head is all over the place. Just let this be a lesson to not only myself but to everyone else who thinks that being on a high streak makes you immune to relapsing, it doesn’t, I feel so lucky right now. Stay strong guys, stay away from temptations!! It really is not worth it.
Brother, i would suggest always remind yourself with one NoFap motivation video daily, if u really want to succeed. Else the mind forgets what is your purpose. And u will find yourself in the midst of things where u dont want to be. Here are a few : I would say, every morning, must watch ,all three. For true focus. Else mind is going to play tricks. And most important, sexual thoughts come becuz i desire to. If once one decides i do not want to have them, after some struggle it will stop.
Wow, that is scary even with all your progress. Glad you could resist. I made 7 days then I slip like I always have done. I'm going to look into some psychological counseling as I know this is related to early childhood trauma that I've blocked. I always acted out compulsively even as a kid because I think I was abused (suppressed) and as a result of this sex addiction my whole life from childhood on, I've had bad problems with depression and sticking up for myself, lots of bullying. I was capable of defending myself but low self esteem has always made me a target for sadistic assholes. Keep up the good work.
Great success story, man! Did you workout? Meditate? Journal? Which habits have helped you say Sober?
Thank you. At the beginning I meditated, but I only did that cos I had the ‘Brainbuddy’ app so it was a daily routine within it. I did it for roughly 2 months then stopped because it wasn’t for me. I also began a journal on the day I began my journey (May 18th) and have wrote in their every day since, I really advise journaling as it’s a good outlet to note down how you’re feeling on that current day & then in the future you can go back to it and read through it, I’ve done this numerous times when I’ve had urges. Working out, yes, regular gym goer for a few years now, since quitting I’ve been able to really become consistent with it and have made some considerable gainz, starting back tomorrow since it reopened so I’m looking forward to getting in there and burning off some built up tension. Gym is such a great outlet to let out all your frustrations and just get after it for that duration of time, for me it’s such a therapeutic hobby. I’d highly recommend gym/journal for sure. Get out for a daily walk everyday as well, can’t beat fresh air in your lungs, really helps clear the brain fog too.
Sound quite similar to myself dude, PMO isn’t the overall problem, we’ve become addicted to PMO due to underlying personal issues which at our adolescent years, we are too young and non the wiser to understand and fix. So obviously having this artificial world which is porn which could make us forget our problems was so good for us, without us actually realising the damage it actually inflicts. Like you say man, childhood trauma is the underlying issue and I’m in the same boat tbh, but you gotta remember that the only way to fix these childhood issues is to stay as far away as possible from PMO! You’ve got this man, if you wanna keep in contact for accountability then drop me an inbox and we can help each other out
Day 203: Much better day today. Stayed off social media all day and when I went to the supermarket I kept my eyes to myself and bought what I went for. Reflecting earlier on yesterday’s antics, I was petrified. I was so close to relapsing, I was literally looking relapsing right in the eyes and could see it saying ‘welcome back’ - that might sound a bit crazy but that’s just how it was man and I’m so thankful I stopped myself from making the biggest mistake of my life to date. Enough of that anyway. I’m feeling a bit lonely atm, I’m currently studying at University but due to Corona all my lectures are online so I am always at home 24/7 & I’m alone. Being on my own and not having anyone to talk to is really getting me down, I have an assignment due in the next few weeks and I just can’t face it, for the past 3 weeks apart from watching my lectures, all I have done is play video games. I’m worried that sooner rather than later this is gonna affect my PMO journey and due to feeling so low mentally, I’m worried that I’m going to relapse just through sheer loneliness. The gyms are back open now so going back there will help a little but I just feel like I’m in such a rut, I don’t know when it will pass. I’m doing so well on my PMO journey and I don’t want to do anything to jeopardise it, any advice/tips would be greatly appreciated, help a brother out
Thanks for your encouragement and common sense. It's really admirable how far you have come and keep that in mind. I hope others will chime in to give you support. I'm in the process of setting up some psychotherapy - want to get down to the real issues behind all this compulsive behavior. Stay strong.
Thank you. I’m really struggling mentally atm, so I’m leaning on this page a hell of a lot right now to get me through. How I’m feeling right now isn’t anything to do with PMO, but I don’t want it to spill in to my PMO journey and ruin all that I have built. Appreciate the kind words, it’s nice to receive support. Hope the psychotherapy is a success and you discover the roots.
Thank you, it seems life's stresses can trigger us easily when we feel vulnerable so it's good you are coming here as much as you can. I struggle with many issues, but when I've given in I'm in a deep black hole again. We can work on these other things without giving power to an excuse to go back.
Brother. What you have done is more than most people ever do in their life. And that is going out of their comfort zone willingly to face the hardest challenge for them at that point in time. That is a definition of a true warrior. What I see reading this lines is pure potential for someone to become mentally invincible. A brother I would gladly have alongside in battle. Everyone has bad days and we all started off with much much more shitty habits ingrained in us in comparison to our parents. Freely available alcohol, drugs, social media, sugar, porn, no interactions, etc. This is mental warfare you are trying to break out off and many years of social programming so do not feel bad about yourself for having so much trouble staying in the clear. It took me five years to truly break free from all of my addictions and once I was in the exact same spot as you are. You clearly show great fortitude by controlling your body urges especially considering being indoors all the time! So your discipline is not a problem at all. Firstly what I think is a MUST is to delete FB and IG, really no point of having it AT ALL unless you run a business and make money with it. If you need it for school to be in the know just delete your current profile and make a new one with just a few friends and that school group and that is it. If you keep spending time and energy on an app that literally harms you and has no benefits you are doing a very very dumb thing. Secondly, don't listen to some pop yt songs which have tons of naked girls in the videos. You are 23 ie. you are a man, even tho they treat you as a child in uni and most friends are beta sacks, remember at this age some 500 years ago you should have already known how to slay a bear and bring it home for dinner. That is your standard to compare against and pop yt vids will do you no help. Listen to AC DC or some drum music of your ancestors if you must. 3rd, video games. You will not be able to ditch all of the things at once normally as you will need to release stress somewhere but keep in mind, to become great, eventually this needs to go too. Buy a notebook, think about your life, what do you want to achieve and do, what kind of a man you want to be, what do you want your kids to see, what girl would look up to you, etc. Pick a thing you wanna become good at and start reading books about it instead of wasting time on mindless mainstream stuff. Training is a must, goes without saying. Lastly, money. Start thinking how to become independent asap, even if that is just for 5%. Can you save more, can you learn a skill that will pay in the future, can you get a weird side job, can you build something of value,... Brain Body Business. This is where your focus should be and days will fly. One day you will wake up and see porn just as girls on the screen not worthy of your attention while craving that street meat. Heck, when you get rid of all the mental barriers and get things going you won't even have the time and energy to deal with most of the real girls out there. That is your reality. I see it in you. I was you about 3 years ago. I pushed through. I am 24 and doing million times better than all of my friends still wasting away. Get serious, don't let women/porn thoughts steal your attention, they are not worth it and you should not tolerate it. You are here to build yourself, your future family and empire. You have no time to fuck around like a child. Society needs strong men.
You’re right man, other life issues should not be a reason to resort back to PMO because that only creates bigger issues. It’s just tough when you’re trying to quit PMO and then you get other problems prop up, it’s mentally taxing and when you stop using external things to ‘take’ the problems away, it can be overwhelming and that’s how I feel right now which isn’t necessarily a bad thing because it’s allowing me to grow as a person because I’m facing my problems head on and not running away from them
Hey man I’m really taken aback by this, I really appreciate the kind words, you’ve really hit home with what you’ve wrote. Thank you so much. I’m quite lost as to what to respond with tbh, everything you’ve said is correct & I'm thankful to this community for providing this platform so people like myself are able to receive some very useful & much needed advice/words of wisdom from people like yourself. Again thank you for that, I’ve been really down recently, I went back to the gym today and usually after a good session in there I come out feeling on top of the world, but today even after hitting it hard, I felt rubbish still, I’m going through a real rough patch atm and it’s affecting every part of my life from uni work to relationships to personal hobbies/interests. Hopefully soon enough I start feeling better and start excelling at everything I love doing.
Yeah, bad days can sometimes stretch into bad weeks/months. Just don't feel sorry for yourself but rather look for solutions. What I've learned is that often feeling depressed or unmotivated doesn't have to be a mind problem but rather a physiological one. If you eat too much sugar your gut bacteria might make you miserable, or you might be hugely deficient in magnesium which affects the brain, ultimately you could just be lonely AF, figure it out and fix it.
Day 209: Hello again, been a tough week tbh. Got an essay to write up which is due soon so I really need to crack on with it but all I’ve done this week is play video games. In the last 3 weeks I’ve lost all motivation to study and complete my work, I don’t know if it’s due to a flatline or whether it’s the 2nd lockdown (here in the UK) what hit me harder than anticipated. The positive I can take out the situation is I’ve been home alone all day till 5pm and have not been tempted to PMO so I’m really pleased on that front. Big thing for me on my PMO journey is I want to fix my social anxiety & during this 209 day streak I can confirm it has improved. There’s still plenty of work to be done but the improvements are clear to me and that’s a real positive of quitting PMO, no more shame to look people in the eyes and talk, you feel clean in a sense because you know you aren’t watching disturbing shit online. Another change I have noticed is my cognitive ability. It’s apparent that PMO gives you brain fog so quitting it really does remove all that fog and it helps me make mature decisions in my day to day life that will put me in a better position in whatever it is I’m making a decision about. After the antics of Sunday (day 202), it was a real shock to the system. Although I’ve been P/M free for 209 days, I replaced that bad habit with staring at every female in public who had a nice figure, which, in a way, is a softer version of P because you’re still stimulating your brain the same way you would with P. So sundays antics really shook me and I made a promise to myself to cut that shit out cos if I keep doing it then I’m objectifying women and that’s not healthy for my brain or for my future relationships, I’m happy to report that it’s been a good week, I’ve kept my eyes off and I feel good, I’ve been calm and I’ve felt happy. Long May it continue!
